Jilly Bean
by breemalio
Summary: An unexpected attraction and three annoying/loving brothers.
1. Chapter 1

First off, I have two accounts in which I've already done an _Outsiders_ fanfic, so you can go check that out on my other account Breemal10. The story is called _Anna Mathews_ and I'm very proud of it.

And now onto this other story of mine...

 **Jilly Bean**

* * *

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

A/N: Set about a year after Johnny's death. Dally didn't die in my version. Sorry not sorry.

* * *

Chapter 1: Day in the Life

"Let's go!"

I groaned as I rolled over my bed. "Yeah!"

"Are you getting up?"

"Yeah!" I yelled with all the effort I had left.

"You're up?"

"Uh-huh."

It was silent for a second before- "Are you up?"

I shot up. "Oh, my god, Darry! Yes, I'm up!"

"Then start getting ready!"

"I am!" I sighed, stopped yelling, and rolled out of my bed. I rubbed my face before I took off my pyjamas and put on a pair of jeans, running my fingers through my hair, and went to go to the bathroom. I opened the door and saw my brother with a towel hung loosely around his waist.

"Hey, Jilly Bean."

I gave him a little shove and grabbed my toothbrush, wetting it under the running water and giving Soda side-eye. "Put some clothes on, Soda."

"I live here." Soda shrugged.

"So do I."

Soda looked like he was thinking. "I'm older."

I smirked. "I'm smarter."

Soda pushed me and I pushed him back. Soda pushed me harder, smiling goofily. "Don't you have school or somethin'?"

I nodded, putting my toothbrush back. "Have fun at work." I ran out of the bathroom to the living room, but ran back to the bathroom and poked my head inside. "Are you picking us up today?"

Soda shook his head. "Nope. Darry." He stopped, looking up at the ceiling. "Wait. Maybe it's me."

I just rolled my eyes playfully, fast-walking into the living room. I saw Darry in the kitchen, putting a sandwich together.

"Jill!" Darry yelled.

I walked into the kitchen. "I'm right here."

"Oh," Darry said, as I walked around him to get a drink from the fridge. He grabbed my shoulder and put the sandwich in my hand. "Here's your sandwich. Now, get."

I nodded, figuring I could just get a drink at school. "Got it, Dar." I walked back out of the kitchen and into the living room, where Pony was sat on the couch, reading a book.

I kicked his leg. "Let's go."

Pony followed me outside and we started on the pathway to school.

"We have a test in chem, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

"Did you study?"

I gave him a look. "Do I ever?"

I never studied. If I did, I skimmed. But I still got good grades. How? I had no idea.

"No." Pony shook his head, then hit my arm. "Two-bit wants to play a game of football after school. You down?"

"Always am," I said, and elbowed him. "Just be prepared to get your ass kicked."

Pony pushed me and I laughed, pushing him. He pushed, I pushed, we wrestled.

* * *

I tapped my pencil against the desk in boredom and I almost dozed off before I felt something hit my face.

"Wha -" I turned around to see Peter Liston raising his eyebrows and making kissing faces. I shook my head and leaned down to pick up the note. When I unraveled it, it just said: 'You + Me + Tonight?'

I shook my head and laughed quietly, turning around and giving Peter a thumbs up.

Peter was such an asshole, but he was a cute asshole. But I really liked the contrast between the two of us. People said we made a good pair and I thought it was because his extremely dark hair went well with my light brown hair, and his wonderfully dark eyes went well with my green ones.

Besides me just liking the way we looked together, I already had a thing with him, so I couldn't go back now.

"Ms. Curtis!"

My head snapped up as I hid the note under my thigh. "Yes, sir?"

"What did I just say?"

"Ms. Curtis," I answered quickly.

The class laughed, but Mr. Dawson wasn't impressed. "Very funny, Ms. Curtis. Maybe you'll have the correct answer in detention after school." Mr. Dawson turned around.

I raised my hand and waved it around. "Uh - Mr. Dawson?"

Mr. Dawson sighed and turned around. "Yes?"

"Do you really want to spend more time with me after school than absolutely necessary?"

Mr. Dawson gave me a hard look before mumbling a, "fine" and turning back to the board.

He was too easy.

* * *

I had finally got through the day and I was just about to go off to Soda's car before someone caught my arm.

"Jill."

I turned around. "What?"

Peter smiled. "Come with me now. That way I won't have to pick you up later."

I pointed my thumb toward Soda's truck. "I gotta tell Soda first." I turned away and I felt Peter smack my butt.

"Hurry up."

I ran to Soda's truck and stopped at his door. "I'm going with Peter."

Soda gave me his best serious look. "What time are you going to be home?"

I shrugged. "Later."

Soda sighed. "You know that Darry doesn't like Peter."

"It's not up to him," I pointed out.

"What do you want me to tell him?"

"Tell him...I'm with...Stacy," I tried, giving him a charming smile.

Pony gave me a look from the passenger seat. "What about football?"

I sighed. "I forgot about that."

"Whatever, Jilly Bean." Soda smiled, though he looked reluctant. "Go have fun."

"I love you," I drawled out, lightly smacking Soda's face and running off to Peter's car, getting into the passengers side. "Good to go."

* * *

"Peter," I sighed, trying to get his attention. "Peter."

"Yeah, yeah, just a minute, baby." Peter waved me off, returning to his conversation with one of his friends.

"Peter."

"Hold on, man," Peter said to his friend, then turned to me, looking annoyed. "What?"

"Are we going to see the movie or are we going screw around?"

We had been standing at the start of the concession line for a while and I was starting to get agitated.

Peter laughed, hitting my arm. "Go on."

I scoffed. "You're not paying?"

Peter shook his head and crossed his arms. "I didn't get my paycheque. I need you to spot me."

I resisted rolling my eyes. I spotted him every time we went to the movies. "I think I'll just go."

That got Peter's attention as he grabbed my arm. "Or..." He smirked and pushed me against the wall. "We can go back to my place."

I laughed and shook my head. "Pete -"

Peter kissed me before I could say anything.

I had to laugh. He thought he was going to get it from me. We had been close before, but not close enough.

I pushed him away. "I don't think so."

Peter put his hands in his pockets and backed away. "Go home, then."

I rolled my eyes. "Are you for real?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

I shook my head, pushing his shoulder roughly and walking away.

I hated making a scene, but that was the last straw for me.

I ended up just walking home.

* * *

I slammed the door closed.

"Jill?"

"Yeah," I confirmed, taking off my jacket.

"Aye, Jilly Bean," Two-bit greeted.

I smiled, tossing my jacket to Two-bit. Two-bit had a spasm as he flipped his body to the side, staying careful to not spill his beer, or drop his cake.

I laughed. "Sorry."

Two-bit gave me a look. "That wasn't very nice."

I heard Steve groan from his spot on the couch, trying to listen to the TV over Two-bit and I's conversation. "You mind?"

I took off one of my shoes and threw it at Steve. It hit Steve's face and when Steve stood up, looking threatening, I ran into the kitchen.

Darry, Pony, and Soda were sitting at the table, eating dinner.

Darry gave me a hard look. "Where were you?"

I walked over to him and picked a piece of garlic bread off of his plate. "I think you know."

"You know I don't like Peter."

I took a bite of the bread. "Why?"

"He's too old for you, Jill." I made a face behind Darry's back, and Pony and Soda laughed. Darry turned around, looking menacing. "What was that?"

"Nothing." I smirked.

"I don't want you hanging around him anymore."

Steve walked into the kitchen, smirking at me. "Hear that, Jill? Darry doesn't want you 'round him anymore."

I pushed Steve's shoulder. "Shut it." I turned back to Darry, biting my lip. "I wouldn't be too worried, Dar."

"You break it off with him?"

I shrugged, walking to the fridge to get a pop. "I don't think there was anything to break. We were casual." I looked up and saw Pony making a face of disgust, Soda looking at me condescendingly, and Darry glaring at me over his shoulder. "What?"

"Casual?" Darry asked, though he sounded like he didn't want to know the answer.

I started to walk out of the kitchen. "Yeah."

"Jill, get back in here."

"Not hungry," I yelled down the hallway. I started to walk to the bathroom, but someone slipped in front of me. "Steve!"

Steve pushed me out of the way. "I have to take a leak."

I grabbed the back of his shirt and yanked him back. "I was here first."

Steve pushed me lightly. "Out of my way, _Jillian_."

I pushed him back. "No, _Steven_."

Steve turned around and pushed me back, slipped inside the bathroom, and shut the door. "Ha!"

I banged on the door. "Steve!"

"Maybe next time, Jilly!"

I banged on the door once more before groaning and walking to my room. When I closed my door, I heard a loud boyish giggle in the living room. That was when I noticed that a lot of things in my room were flipped upside down.

I didn't know why Two-bit did stuff like that, but it was stupid. I suspected the help of Soda.

"Two-bit!"

Living with boys was not always easy.

* * *

The next day went by quickly and then came to an agonizingly slow pace when I sat down in the kitchen to do my homework. It didn't help that the boys were screaming in the living room.

"Hey, will you guys be quiet?" I yelled. As if the boys would listen to me. Soda, Steve, and Two-bit's shouts didn't quiet. "Hey!"

"What?" Soda yelled back to me.

"Shut it!"

"I can't hear you!"

I groaned as Steve walked into the kitchen, hitting my shoulder. "What's you problem, kid?"

"My problem is that I'm trying to study."

I heard Steve open the fridge behind me before I felt his heavy hand on the back of my chair. "What's got you so worried?"

I sighed. "I'm slippin'."

Steve hit my head. "Better get them grades up."

I reached back and smacked Steve. "Get out of here."

The phone rang at the perfect time, and Steve was the closest to it, so he picked it up.

"The Curtis residence." His brows furrowed. "Who?" Then he rolled his eyes and held the phone out to me. "It's your boyfriend."

I got up and took the phone from his, elbowing him in the process. "He's not my boyfriend." I put the phone up to my ear. "Hello?"

* * *

I didn't know how I got myself in those situations where my brain turned off.

Obviously, my brain had turned off when Peter apologized and asked me to come over to his house. I also must've blacked out when we started to make out. And it was still blacked out when Peter started to take off my shirt. Then, thankfully, I had awoken.

"Peter."

"What?" He breathed against my neck while pulling of my shirt.

"Stop." I tried to scoot away.

"Why?"

I pushed on his chest. "Why do you think?"

Peter tried to smile. "C'mon, baby. I -"

"No." I turned my face, so he couldn't kiss me.

Peter leaned back and sat on his couch, pulling a cigarette out of his pocket. "What's been with you lately?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. I dug my fingers between the couch cushions nervously at his question. My brows furrowed when I touched something that didn't feel like part of the couch. I pulled my hand out, still holding onto the fabric. When I pulled it out, deep red bounced up from the brown couch cushions. "What the hell is this?"

Peter looked at the underwear. "Panties?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. "They're not mine. Whose are they?"

"I don't know."

I scoffed, stood and thew the underwear at Peter. "You're such an asshole."

Peter stood, brushing the underwear off. "C'mon, baby."

I grabbed my jacket and slipped it on. "I was looking for an excuse to cut you loose anyway."

"Cut me loose?" Peter scoffed, shifting on his feet. " _You_ cut _me_ loose? Try the other way around, baby. You're lucky to have a guy like me."

"Oh, yeah, sure." I reached for the doorknob, but Peter caught my arm and spun me around.

"You listenin' to me?"

I tried to pull my arm out of his grasp. "Let go, Peter."

"No."

I slapped him. It take take long for Peter to react by slapping me back. I held my cheek in surprise, but didn't waste time to punch Peter in the face.

No one laid a hand on me. I didn't have a ton of respect for myself, but I had enough to know that that shouldn't of just happened.

I turned quickly and ran outside, all the way home.

* * *

I slammed the door and ran past the kitchen.

"Jill!" Darry yelled at me as I ran past.

"Not hungry!"

"Jill!"

I went straight to my room, slamming and locking the door behind me. I leaned against the door and breathed heavily. I nearly jumped out of my skin when there was a loud knock on the other side of the door.

"Jill?"

I sighed. "What is it, Pony?"

"Can you -" He jiggled the doorknob. "Open the door?"

"No."

"Jill."

I turned around and opened the door, keeping my head down. I jumped on my bed and buried my face in it as soon as I heard Pony open the door. "What?"

"What's goin' on with you?"

I heard Pony sit on the bed. "Nothin'."

"I know when you're lying, Jill. I'm your brother, your _twin._ Plus, I'm older, so you have to tell me."

"Only by a couple minutes," I mumbled.

"What's wrong, Jill?"

"I said, nothin' was wrong."

"So you're gonna lie to me?"

I grew tired and more guilty when I could feel Pony's eyes burning into my back. I turned onto my stomach and looked at him. "No."

Pony sat up straight, staring at me with wide eyes. "What the hell happened?"

"Peter and I -"

"Peter," Pony growled.

"Pony -"

Pony stood. "I knew he was an asshole, but I never -"

"Pony."

"Thought that -"

"Pony, I'm fine, really." I smiled comfortingly. "I got a good hit in."

Pony crossed his arms, still looking mad. "Are you gonna tell Darry?"

I laughed, shaking my head. "No."

"Soda?"

I considered. "Probably not."

"You have to tell them."

I stood, walking over to my desk to my unfinished homework. "Why?"

"Because I can't beat him up by myself."

"I'll them, eventually, Pony. Until then, don't say anything."

"Jill -"

I turned around. "I can handle it, Pony. I'm not a kid, alright?"

"Yeah, but you're a -" Pony stopped, giving me a look as he held his mouth together tightly.

"A girl?" I narrowed my eyes. "I could kick his ass. You know I could."

There was a knock at the door. "What's goin' on in there?"

I slumped against my dresser. "Nothin', Dare."

"Then get out here and eat some supper."

"Be there in a second." I turned back to my dresser, opening up a compact of powder.

"Where'd you get the makeup?" Pony asked.

"Stacy gave it to me. Somethin' about looking like a girl."

Pony laughed. "Good luck with that."

I patted the makeup on my bruise, looking at Pony through the mirror. "What was that?"

Pony smirked. "Nothin'."

I tried not to smile. "That's what I thought."

"Jill, Pony!"

"We're coming!" Pony yelled for me.

I sighed as I looked into the mirror. It looked fine to me, but I turned to Pony for reassurance. "How do I look?"

Pony shrugged. "Like a girl?"

I nodded. "Alright."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 2: Not a Kid

"Jill!"

"What?"

"You listenin'?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

Pony laughed and I hit his shoulder. Pony stopped laughing and pushed me back. Steve grabbed the back of Pony's shirt and yanked him away.

"Cut it out, and let's play." Steve clapped his hands loudly, turning to Darry, Soda, and Two-bit a couple feet away from us. "We're ready!"

Darry nodded and we all got into position. My hand touched the rough grass as I breathed in the fresh air.

Ah, nothing like a good game of football after supper.

Football was my favourite sport. And my team usually won, which was a bonus. Pony and I had the speed, while Steve had the strength. On the other team, Darry had enough muscle of all of us put together, but Soda couldn't run too fast and Two-bit was next to useless.

I watched as Pony held the ball with his index finger, Steve a little ways away, getting ready to do the kickoff.

We waited for Darry's call. "Go!"

Steve ran forward, kicking the ball with impressive accuracy. As soon as his foot made contact, I started running. I caught it, of course, and ran further down the open field, passing to Pony, who ran the rest of the way, scoring an easy point for us.

"Woo!" I threw my arms up and ran back to position, hitting Soda's arm on the way.

We set up again and after Darry's call, the ball landed in my hand, but when I looked up, no one was paying attention.

"Will you look at that?" Two-bit mused, then whistled and the pretty blonde across the street. "Hey, baby, I don't bite…unless you want me to!"

Soda hit Two-bit's shoulder as they laughed. Pony and Darry shook their head, surely unimpressed.

I simply rolled my eyes. "Do guys actually like girls like that?"

Steve shrugged. "She's pretty stacked."

"You're gross."

Steve laughed. "Jealous?"

"No," I said surely.

"Don't stress, Jill. You're hot, too." Steve smacked my backside lightly.

I turned around and wrapped my arms around his neck tightly, yanking him downward. Steve flipped me onto the grass and I lost my breath. Steve couldn't let me get up and sat on my back, pulling my arm behind my back. "You know what to say."

"I won't say it," I groaned, feeling the pain in my arm. I would never holler 'Uncle'. Never.

"I'll save you, Jill!" I heard Soda yelled, then the sudden loss of weight from my back, followed by a grunt from Steve.

I got up quickly, backing away and smiling at Soda, who was rolling around in the dirt with Steve.

"What'd he do?" Two-bit asked from behind me.

I brushed off my clothes. "He called me hot."

Two-bit looked disgusted, then smirked. "Is he blind?"

I whipped around to hit Two-bit, but he dodged.

At this rate, we'd never get back to playing football.

* * *

The next day went by slowly, but I had still managed to avoid Peter the whole day. I felt like I was sweating, trying to avoid Peter all day, that when I got home, I felt like I needed a shower.

After my shower, I nearly died when the door suddenly opened.

I clutched my towel close to me, but it was just Steve. I groaned as I leaned on the counter. "Don't you knock?"

"Nope." Steve bumped me lightly and started rummaging through the cupboard and drawers.

"What're you lookin' for?"

Steve ignored me and shut the drawer harshly. "Nothin'." He sat up straight and looked at me. "I - what the hell is that?"

I turned away immediately, wanting to smack myself for forgetting. "Nothin'."

Steve grabbed my face and turned it to face him. His brows furrowed as he ran a finger over the bruise on my cheek. After that, he stepped away from me and put his hands on his hips. "What the hell were you thinkin'?"

I scoffed. "What was _I_ thinking?"

"Yeah, what were you thinkin', gettin' involved with that guy?" he said, his voice rising. "That's what happens when you date an asshole!"

I was too angry to focus on keeping my mouth shut. "Why are you yelling at me?"

"Because you're bein' stupid!"

"It's not a big deal!"

"Like hell it is!" Steve took a step forward. "What do you think your brothers will say when they hear 'bout this?"

I narrowed my eyes. "They won't."

"If you don't tell 'em, I will."

I merely laughed. "No, you won't."

"Wanna bet?" Steve looked very serious, which scared me.

I shook my head and crossed my arms. "I'll tell them later."

"When's later?"

"Whenever I feel like later is."

Steve looked like he was going to yell at me more, but he just sighed. "What's that kids name again?"

"Peter."

"Last name?"

"You're not doing anything," I said, turning away and thumbing my towel. "Now, get the hell out of here."

Steve grumbled quietly before walking out of the bathroom.

I looked at myself in the mirror as the knot in my stomach unwound. I sighed and washed my face before I decided that it was time to get dressed.

* * *

The day after that, I was able to avoid Peter again, but I had the unsettling feel in my stomach because of what happened with Steve.

"Jill?"

"Huh?"

Pony was starting down the path to our house. "You comin'?"

I looked at him, then forward at the path ahead of me, then back at Pony again. "I think I'm goin' to the DX."

"Why?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I just feel like it, I guess."

Pony laughed. "Alright. I'll see you at supper."

I nodded, starting to walk forward. "Yeah, see you then." I walked to the DX in record time and practically ran through the door.

"Jilly, hey," Soda greeted with a smile. "What're you doin' here?"

At that moment I knew that Steve hadn't said anything and I smiled. "Just felt like it." I looked over Soda's shoulder and Steve, who was smirking.

"Just felt like it, huh?"

I nodded firmly. "Yes."

"Oh." My attention turned to Soda, who was moving around the customer, brown eyes gleaming, wide smile on his face. "Gotta help a customer."

I turned, to no surprise, to see a group of pretty girls. I turned back around and walked over to Steve. "Hey."

Steve smiled at me, then continued to work on a car. "Why don't you just ask me?"

"I know you didn't."

"How'd you know?"

"Because Soda would not be that happy." I smiled. "You backed out, huh?"

Steve gave me a hard look before continuing onto his car again. "I decided to give you another day."

"You can't boss me around, Steve." I crossed my arms. "I'm not a kid."

"Right."

"I'm not."

"You're fifteen, Jill. You're still a kid."

"You're seventeen. Technically, you're a kid, too."

"I'm not a kid. Plus, I'm mature."

I smirked. "Right."

Steve pushed my shoulder. "You wanna go?"

I pushed him back. "Yeah, let's go."

Steve smiled before going back to the car. "Maybe some other time. I gotta work."

I turned back and sat at a counter, spreading my homework in front of me and getting started on it.

* * *

I closed my locker, only to run into someone.

"Jill!" he yelled in my face.

I was startled to say the least. "What?"

"Where's your brother?"

"Pony?"

Curly nodded. "Yeah."

"He's sick." I pushed myself off the lockers and turned to walk away.

"He's supposed to let me copy his homework." I heard Curly following behind me.

I smiled at him. "Oh, what a shame."

Curly mocked me. "Whatever. Get him to call me, will you?"

I nodded. "Sure."

"Alright. See you 'round, Jill." He squeezed my butt.

I turned around punch him but he was already running away, laughing hard. "Curly!"

"Hey!" Someone yelled after Curly. "Do that again and I'll pound you!"

I rolled my eyes. "What do you want, Peter?" I walked away, but he followed.

"I think we need to talk."

"No, I think I'm good."

Then I felt something wet on my face as he wiped away the makeup on my cheek. "That's a good one."

"What the hell, Peter?" I put my hand over my cheek, looking around to make sure no one saw, though I was more embarrassed of wearing makeup than the purple bruise on my cheek.

"Do you want another one?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Then we're goin' out after school."

I shook my head again. "No, we're not." Peter grabbed my arm roughly and I wiggled my arm out quickly. "Fine."

Peter smirked, leaning in to kiss my cheek, but I pushed him away. His smirk didn't falter. "Later, baby."

I sighed as I watched him walk away.

* * *

I didn't stick around and wait for Peter. That was my first mistake.

"Jill!" Peter nearly ran me over with his car when he swerved in front of me.

"Jesus, Peter!" I screamed. "What the hell are you doing?"

Peter moved quickly, getting out of his car and moving around to me, grabbing the back of my neck tightly. "What the hell are _you_ doing?" He threw me down onto the ground.

"Don't take rejection well?" I seethed out, rubbing the spot where it felt like he had taken a piece of my neck.

Talking back to Peter was my second mistake.

His foot connected to my side.

"Ah," I cringed and pushed my teeth against each other to keep in any noise that would suggest I was hurt.

"What'd you say, bitch?"

"Hey!"

My saviour.

"What do you want, Randle?"

There was the satisfying sounds of someone getting their face pounded in and I knew it was Peter who was getting the bad end of things.

"Get out of here before I break the rest of you."

I sighed when I heard Peter's car take off. I felt Steve grab my arm and pull me up. "The hell are you doing, Jill?"

I pushed him away from me, brushing off my jeans. "None of your business."

Steve scoffed, wiping his bloody nose. "I just saved your sorry ass."

I patted his shoulder. "Yeah, thanks for that." I picked my books off of the ground started to walk away.

"Jill." Steve grabbed my arm again and pulled me to him. "Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

I furrowed my brows. "Why? You're not my brother."

"Speaking of which, are you gonna tell them?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Then we're goin' out after school."

I shook my head again. "No, we're not." Peter grabbed my arm roughly and I wiggled my arm out quickly. "Fine."

Peter smirked, leaning in to kiss my cheek, but I pushed him away. His smirk didn't falter. "Later, baby."

I sighed as I watched him walk away.

* * *

I didn't stick around and wait for Peter. That was my first mistake.

"Jill!" Peter nearly ran me over with his car when he swerved in front of me.

"Jesus, Peter!" I screamed. "What the hell are you doing?"

Peter moved quickly, getting out of his car and moving around to me, grabbing the back of my neck tightly. "What the hell are _you_ doing?" He threw me down onto the ground.

"Don't take rejection well?" I seethed out, rubbing the spot where it felt like he had taken a piece of my neck.

Talking back to Peter was my second mistake.

His foot connected to my side.

"Ah," I cringed and pushed my teeth against each other to keep in any noise that would suggest I was hurt.

"What'd you say, bitch?"

"Hey!"

My saviour.

"What do you want, Randle?"

There was the satisfying sounds of someone getting their face pounded in and I knew it was Peter who was getting the bad end of things.

"Get out of here before I break the rest of you."

I sighed when I heard Peter's car take off. I felt Steve grab my arm and pull me up. "The hell are you doing, Jill?"

I pushed him away from me, brushing off my jeans. "None of your business."

Steve scoffed, wiping his bloody nose. "I just saved your sorry ass."

I patted his shoulder. "Yeah, thanks for that." I picked my books off of the ground started to walk away.

"Jill." Steve grabbed my arm again and pulled me to him. "Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

I furrowed my brows. "Why? You're not my brother."

"Speaking of which, are you gonna tell them?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Your head's bleeding."

"Cool."

"Jillian."

"Steven."

Steve grabbed my arm, that time dragging me to his truck. "I'm goin' to work. I can drop you off at your house."

I rolled my eyes, getting inside of Steve's truck. It was silent for a while, until we were close to home base.

"So what happened?"

I sighed. "I broke it off and Peter didn't take it well."

"Didn't take it well?" Steve scoffed. "Jill, that prick -"

"I know," I said in a hard tone. "I know already. I'm gonna hear this from Darry for the rest of my life, so I don't need it from you."

"Why aren't you more careful, huh? Stop being such a stupid kid."

"I'm not a kid."

"Right."

"Whatever." I crossed my arms against my chest and scooted away from Steve until we got to my house, when I got out and ran to my door. When I got inside, I knew Pony was the only one home, so I went straight to his room to see how he was doing.

I didn't look that bad. As long as Pony couldn't see the back of my head, I was fine.

I knocked on the door. "Pony?"

"Yeah?" Pony sounded weak.

I laughed as I opened the door. "Hey."

"Hey." Pony sat up slowly and laughed when he saw me. "Were you rolling around in the dirt?"

I laughed, too. "Got into it with someone."

"Who?"

"No one that matters." I sat down beside him. "How you feelin'?" I touched his hot forehead.

"Fine."

"Bull." I retracted my hand. His forehead was really hot.

"Did you get the work I missed?"

"Yeah." I pulled out of textbook, but it slipped out of my hand. "Damnit." I reached down to get it.

"Jill!"

I leaned up. "What?"

Pony gave me his serious look. "What happened to your head?"

I paused. "What're talkin' about?"

"You know what."

I stayed silent for a second, before I said, "Does it matter?"

"Yes."

"Peter happened," I answered, standing up. "Is that what you wanted to hear?"

Pony put a hand over his face, rubbing his eyes. "Jesus, Jill."

I sighed. "I know."

"What are you gonna tell Darry?"

"Nothin'."

Pony dropped his hand, looking at me in surprise. "You're not gonna tell him after this?"

I shrugged. "It's not a big deal."

Pony shook his head. "It is, Jill."

"It's really not."

"Whatever," Pony sighed. "You'll have to tell him eventually."

"I will," I said dishonestly.

Pony nodded, knowing that I was lying. "Right."

I fell back onto the bed. "Right." I got back up when I remembered that Darry wanted me to make supper tonight. "I'm going to the living room. Holler if you need anything."

"Sure."

After taking a shower, I did my homework, and started supper.

Sooner rather than later, the door slammed. "Hello?"

"In here, Soda."

Soda came running into the kitchen, wrapping his arms around me and spinning around. "Jilly Bean!"

I laughed. "Soda!"

He put me down and popped his collar. "Guess who has a date?"

I point to Steve, who was leaning against the wall, looking significantly less happy than Soda. "Steve?"

Soda ruffled my hair. "Me!"

"With who?" I turned back to supper.

"Camille Hall."

I looked at him over my shoulder with a smirk. "Congrats."

I didn't know why Soda settled for girls like Camille Hall. He was too good for her, looks and all.

"Why isn't Darry home yet?"

I shrugged. "Guess he's running late. Maybe he's working late again."

Darry was doing that a lot lately.

"Hey, Jill." Steve caught my attention. "What's that on your face?"

I was confused for a second, but gave him a scowl.

"What?" Soda asked, confused.

I wasn't surprised that Soda didn't notice. The bruise was fading and Soda was never good at paying attention the detail anyway.

"What?" I mimicked, hoping he would drop it.

Soda grabbed my arm and spun me around, his eyes looking over my face. They widened when he saw the unnatural colour of a spot on my cheek. "Is that a bruise?"

I felt bad because Soda looked upset.

"Yes."

"No," I said no at the same time that Steve said yes. I gave Steve a look. "Get out, Steve."

Steve smirked, making himself comfortable in a chair at the dining room table.

Soda snapped his fingers in my face. "Hey. Focus."

I turned back to Soda. "Yes, it's a bruise."

Soda looked more upset. "Who hit you?"

I sighed and turned around. "No one."

"Peter."

I looked to a smug looking Steve. "Steve!"

Soda didn't look all too surprised. "Peter did this?"

"And more. Tell him about today, Jill."

"What are you even doing here?" I asked Steve loudly, but I wasn't yelling.

"Steve," Soda sighed. "Can you..."

Steve gave me a hard look before nodding and walking out of the kitchen.

"Asshole," I muttered.

Soda grabbed my chin, making my face turn to him. "Peter Liston?"

I nodded. "Yes." I turned back to the supper that I couldn't seem to finish.

"Jesus, Jilly."

I swallowed a lump in my throat. "Yeah, I know."

Soda was quiet for a good minute. "What happened today?"

I shook my head, making a mental note to punch Steve in the face later. "Nothin'."

"Jill."

I shrugged. "He just wanted to talk, but -"

"But?"

"But we didn't do much talking."

I heard Soda kick a cupboard, and I sighed. He hit another cupboard before he said, "Why wouldn't you tell me?" His voice was starting to get louder.

"Because it's not a big deal."

"Not a big deal? This guy put his hands on you!"

I spun around angrily. "I know! I know he did, Soda, but I'm not gonna make this a big deal. Leave it alone and it will go away!"

Soda pointed a finger at me. "No, leave it alone and it will get worse."

"I don't care, Soda!" I couldn't help but yell. "I don't want you doing anything!"

"What am I -"

The door slammed and I heard Darry. "I'm home! Hey, Steve." Darry walked into the kitchen. "Hey, guys. I -" He stopped when he saw Soda and I at completely opposite sides of the kitchen, looking unsettled. "What's going on?"

I gave Soda a look. "Nothin'."

Soda crossed his arms against his chest. "Somethin'."

Darry set his bag down. "Is someone gonna tell me what it is?"

"No."

"Yes."

I huffed. "Soda's being dramatic."

"Me?" Soda said, leaning off the counter and uncrossing his arms. "Jill gets smacked around by a guy and wants me to step back!"

"I told you that I don't care!"

"Well, I do!"

"Stop!" Darry yelled and looked at me. "What is Sodapop talking about?"

I rolled my eyes. I was done talking about it. "Peter and I broke things off and he didn't take it well."

"Didn't take it well how?" Darry crossed his arms.

"We fought a little."

Soda made a noise. "He hit her."

Darry's eyes stuck to mine, anger flaring in them. "What?"

"Oh, my god." I abandoned the supper and tried to walk out of the kitchen, but Darry stepped in front of me.

"You're not going anywhere until you explain this to me."

I tried pushing him. "Get out of my way, Darry."

"Stop." Darry pushed me backward lightly. "Tell me _now_."

"Or what?"

"Or you're grounded."

"I'll take it."

Darry's eyes went up in my flames. "I'm sick and tired of this attitude your givin', Jill! You need to make an adjustment."

"I'm not the one that needs to adjust!" I yelled back.

Darry breathed through his nose harshly, trying to calm himself. "You're gonna tell me what's goin' on right now."

"I'll pass."

"You're grounded."

"What?" I asked unbelievingly.

"Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

"No!"

"That's another week. Now are you gonna tell me?"

I felt my skin grow hot. "You're an asshole, Darry!"

"Don't speak to me that way!"

I hit Darry's chest and he moved out of the way. I knew it was just because he was exhausted, and I took advantage of it. "I'm going out."

"We're not done talking about this, Jill."

I slammed the door as hard as I could, fixing my jacket to sit comfortingly on my shoulders as I walked down the path.

I grumbled when I heard footsteps behind me. If it was Pony, I could deal. Soda, I could maybe deal. Darry, I couldn't.

"Slow down, will you?"

I turned around, swinging my fist to hit Steve's face, but he ducked. "What the hell, Steve?"

Steve leaned back up. "Watch it, Jill."

"Why'd you do that?" I questioned angrily.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what. Why'd you tell Soda?"

Steve dropped the act as he got angry. "Because he deserves to get his ass kicked!"

"He already did!" I said, louder than I should've. "By you!"

"More than once, Jill!"

I groaned, stomping my foot on the ground. "You're so -" I grumbled. "And you're too -"

"What?"

"Difficult!" I said. That was the only word I could think of, but it was still accurate. "I'm not some kid that needs to be taken care of!"

"You _are_ a kid, Jill!" Steve argued, then looked at me in weird way as he sighed and put his hands on his hips. "You're just a kid."

I sighed as I felt my body drag down. "I'm so tired of everyone yelling at me." I turned around and started to walk. "I know it's wrong and I know that he needs a good ass kicking, but I just want to forget about it."

"Soda won't forget about it until his fist hits Peter's face a couple times."

I laughed, though I didn't want to. "Fine."

Then something weird happened. Steve put his arm around me.

I gave him a weird look and I smirked. "Are you tryin' to give me a hug?"

Steve's arm slipped off of me. "I gave it my best shot."

I elbowed him. "You did alright. I mean, you could use some practice."

"Shut it."

It was weird how someone I hated in that moment could make me forget about Peter for just a small second. Maybe I didn't like Steve all the time, but I was thankful for him.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 3: Handle the Randle

I came home for supper, but I took it and went to my room, not talking to anyone for the rest of the night.

In the morning when I went into the kitchen, Darry was making a sandwich for me like he always was.

"Good mornin'."

I nodded. "Mornin'."

Darry finished up, putting the bread together and holding out the sandwich for me. "Here."

I reached out for it, but Darry pulled it back. "What?"

Darry sighed. "We're still not done talking about what happened yesterday."

"I think we are." I grabbed the sandwich from his hand.

"Why won't you talk to me, Jill?"

"You're not dad, Darry. You're my brother! I don't _have to_ tell you anything." I regretted saying it as soon as I said it. I was just so tired of everyone talking about it.

I could tell Darry was hurt, but he covered it up well. "I'm your brother and your legal guardian. What I say, goes."

I loved Darry and I was proud to call him my brother. We had our issues since our parents died, since Johnny died, since everything, and Pony started to like Darry less and less, but I admired him. Darry was so young and he had to become a grown up too soon. Darry should've been going out with friends, going to parties, and having the young-adult experience. Instead he was working until he could barely keep his eyes open, only to come home and make sure we had something to eat, and Pony and I had our homework done. Because of that, I loved Darry even more.

So I leaned against the wall. "I'll tell you whatever you want, if you don't yell at me."

Darry looked surprised, but just went on to asking. "Was that the first time?"

"Yesterday?"

"Yes."

"No."

Darry nodded stiffly. "And why didn't you tell me?

"Because I didn't think it was a big deal."

"Jill -"

"You can't yell at me," I stated as I knew he was getting angry.

Darry put his pointed finger down. "I know. I just don't understand what was going through your brain."

"Next question, Darry."

"Are you still with him?"

"No."

Darry looked happier for the first time this morning. "Good."

I pushed myself off the wall. "You seem pretty calm about this."

Darry shook his head. "I'm not."

I smiled and wrapped my arms around him in a hug. "Thank you for pretending to be."

Darry rubbed my back. "You're welcome."

I felt like we were having a moment. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Darry pushed my away lightly and patted my shoulder. "Now, get out. You've got school."

I was just about to walk out before Soda walked in the kitchen in a hurry, buttoning his DX shirt. "Mornin'."

I reached for his arm. "Soda, I -"

Soda stopped buttoning his shirt and held my face, kissing my forehead. "I'm over it and I'm sorry, too."

I raised my eyebrows. "Really?" My eyes narrowed quickly. "What'd you do?"

"Nothing," Soda said innocently and he turned to Darry. "Yet."

"Soda!"

Soda smiled at me. "Don't you have school to get to?"

I shook my head, not being able to fight the smile as I walked out of the kitchen and ran down to Pony's room. "Pony!"

"Yeah, I'm coming." Pony opened the door.

"How you feelin'?"

Pony shrugged. "Okay, I guess."

"Good, because we're running laps in gym today." I started to walk down the hallway as Pony groaned behind me.

* * *

"Yeah, Curtis, that's what I'm talkin' about!"

I smiled brightly as Stacy ran over to me, flushed and breathing heavily. "How did you do that?"

I pointed to the net and laughed. "I kicked the ball into the net."

"That sounds so hard," Stacy whined.

I laughed again, knowing that Stacy would've much rather enjoyed painting her nails. "Cool it, Stace. Just pass to me."

Stacy gave me a look. "I'm not touching that thing."

"The soccer ball?"

"Yes, that thing!"

I patted her shoulder. "Then just look pretty."

Stacy smiled. "Will do."

"Curtis, Kalen! Let's go!"

"Uh, Mrs. Janner?" Stacy yelled to our teacher. "Can I take a bathroom break?"

"Fine!"

I shook my head at Stacy's ability to charm herself out of any situation.

* * *

As I got into the car, I didn't notice Soda's right away, but I had noticed eventually. "Good god." I reached out and touched the cut on his lips, avoiding the bruises. I pulled away and gave him an incredulous look. "Soda!"

"What?" Soda tried the innocent act.

"When did you even find the time to beat up Peter?"

Soda smiled and looked over his shoulder to Pony, who was smiling, too. "I took a long lunch break."

I shook my head and crossed my arms, leaning against the seat. "You're horrible."

Pony laughed. "Oh, c'mon, Jill. Loosen up, huh?"

"Yeah, c'mon, Jilly!" Soda agreed. "Loosen up! Maybe we can do it as a family next time."

I barely held in a laugh, but couldn't fight back a smile. "You're both dumb." I looked at Pony. "Yes, you, too."

Pony smiled at me. "You love us."

I sighed and turned back around, smiling. "Unfortunately."

* * *

I was so glad I hadn't had any homework because all I felt like I wanted to do was watch TV.

When we got home, Pony went to his room and Soda went to the kitchen. It was his turn to make supper. I turned on the TV and went over to the couch, falling down onto it.

It was only matter of time before Two-bit and Steve came over. Steve was first, marching in through the front door and to the kitchen, not a word spoken. He came out of the kitchen with a beer as he pulled my legs up and sat down, putting them back down on his lap once he was situated.

I raised my eyebrows. "What's your deal?"

"None of your business," Steve said, taking a large gulp of his beer.

I shook my head. "Seriously, Steve. What's goin' on?"

Steve glanced at me. "Seriously, it's none of your business."

I went back to watching the TV. Steve would vent to Soda later and then he wouldn't be so grumpy.

Before I could even focus on the TV, Two-bit came bouncing in, doing the same as Steve, except his hand that didn't have a beer in it, had a slice of chocolate cake.

"Hey, Jilly," he greeted me before he sat down in front of the TV.

"Hey, Two."

"Hello, Steve." Two-bit smiled at Steve. Steve just growled, making Two-bit raise his eyebrows. "Sorry, grumpy."

I laughed as Steve rolled his eyes.

That was how I spent my day until dinner.

"How was school today?" Darry asked over the clinking of forks on our plates.

I shrugged. "Alright."

Pony did the same. "It was okay."

Darry nodded. "Are you workin' on getting that biology mark up, Jill?"

I bit my lip as Steve snickered beside me. "Sort of."

"What does that mean?" Darry gave his adult-look.

"I'm trying, Dar."

"Try harder."

I sighed, twirling spaghetti on my fork. "Got it."

"You, too, Pony. Your homework had been piling up."

Pony avoided Darry's eyes. "I know."

"Work on it."

Pony nodded. "Alright, Darry."

Soda, mouth full of food, decided to speak up. "Steve and I had a good day at work."

I smiled at my plate. "I'm sure you did."

Steve laughed. "Yeah, it was good."

"What was so good about it?" Darry asked.

All the boys smiled mischievously as Steve answered for Soda. "We kicked Peter's ass."

"Sodapop Curtis." Darry turned to Soda. He had a scolding tone, but the corners of his lips were turned up.

"Sorry, Dare." Soda shrugged and I knew they were fist-bumping underneath the table.

I shook my head. "You're all crazy."

* * *

I didn't have any homework the next night either, so Stacy suggested we go to the drive-in, and I agreed.

Standing in line for popcorn grew increasingly boring until Stacy spotted a group of guys, clearing taking an interest in her.

"Look." Stacy elbowed me and point non-discreetly.

I chuckled. "Put your hand down, Stace. Unless you want them to come over here, you should put your hand down."

Stacy shrugged. "Maybe I'll just go over there."

"Stacy!" I whisper-yelled as she smiled mischievously. "If you ditch me for Calvin Mars, I'll never forgive you."

Stacy hit my shoulder. "I'll be back before you know it." She skipped off and I could hear her greet Calvin Mars and his buddies in a cheery, girly tone.

"What're you doin' here?"

I gasped lightly, as the voice was so close to my ear. I elbowed Steve back to give me some distance. "What're _you_ doin' here?"

"I wanna see a movie."

I smirked. "Alone?"

Steve smirked, too. "No. With that fox over -" He turned and pointed to a spot where no one was.

My smirk widened. "Oh, yeah?"

Steve's smirk dropped and he tried to hide his embarrassment. "Well, you're alone, too."

"No, I'm with Stacy."

Steve looked around dramatically. "And where would she be?"

I turned to where Stacy should've been and wasn't. "Damn it." I turned to Steve. "Looks like you're takin' me instead."

Steve groaned. "Do I have to pay?"

I smiled. "Of course."

He walked past me, pulling out a couple bucks from his pocket. "You owe me."

After we sat down and started watching the movie, I realized the movie wasn't nearly as interesting as I would've liked it to be.

"This movie sucks," Steve spoke my thoughts out loud.

I shrugged, trying to shine some light. "It's not that bad."

Steve turned his head and gave me a look, though his face contorted to a scowl as he looked over my shoulder. "Scuzz at ten o'clock."

I looked over my shoulder and almost caught the eye of Peter. Thankfully, I turned away at the last second. I groaned as I looked at Steve. "What is he doing?"

Steve didn't try to be sneaky about spying on Peter. "He's pointin' and laughin'."

"Is he coming over here?"

"No."

I sighed. "Good."

"Oh -" Steve started, eyebrows raising.

"What?" I said, alarmed.

"He looks like he wants a word with you."

I tapped my foot nervously. "Do something."

"Me?" Steve scoffed. "I thought you weren't a kid, and could deal with it yourself."

I rolled my eyes. "I change my mind."

"He's walki -"

"Steve, do something," I said quickly.

I could hear the annoyed tone in his voice when he said, "What do you want me to do?"

"I don't know, something," I said. "Something to make him go away."

Steve took me by complete surprise when he grabbed the back of my head and pulled my face to his, placing his lips on mine.

My first instinct was to push him away, but I didn't. Instead, I moved my lips against his. I couldn't help but think about how soft his lips were or how much more I liked kissing Steve than any other boy I had kissed.

It was strange to me, but I kind of liked it.

I just about ran my fingers through his dark, greasy hair before he pulled away.

My brain was restored as I realized what had happened. "Steve!" I moved my hand up to wipe my mouth, but Steve caught it and held it.

"Wait," he said, not paying attention to me, but looking over my shoulder. His lips turned up into a smirk and he rubbed my hand in his. "He didn't like that."

I almost smiled, if not for the strange position. "Is he gone?"

Steve let go and repositioned himself in his seat, facing the screen again. "He's not gone, but I don't think he'll be coming over here."

"Good," I said, sitting back into a comfortable position in my seat. "Thanks."

"Anytime."

Steve seemed totally neutral, but I felt awkward.

I had just kissed my brother's best friend. My own friend. I didn't know how to feel.

The best I could do was joke around. "Are we gettin' married now?"

Steve scoffed. "You couldn't handle the Randle."

My eyes widened. "That was the worst line that I've ever heard."

Steve turned to me, looking offended. "What're you talkin' about? That was good."

I ate some of my popcorn, smirking. "How long did you work on that one, huh?"

"Just watch the movie, Jill."

* * *

When Steve pulled up to my house, I sat quietly for a moment until I got tired of the silence. "Thanks, Steve."

"Yeah, sure." Steve barely smiled, then gestured to my house. "Now get the hell out."

I laughed, opening the door and getting out. "See you."

"Don't forget to pay me back!"

I shut the door, running to my house. "I can't hear you!" I ran inside and closed the door behind me, still laughing.

"What's so funny?"

I gasped lightly, unaware of Soda's presence. I sat up from the door and took off his jacket. "Nothin'." I hung up my jacket and took off my shoes.

"How was the movie?"

I shrugged. "It was alright."

"Stacy's not stayin' over?"

Stacy. I had forgotten about her, as I'm sure she did about me.

I shook my head. "No, she's got a...thing."

Soda narrowed his eyes at me. "Hey, you alright?"

I nodded, smiling and walking toward the hallway. "Just peachy." I huddled down the hallway before I got into my room.

I sighed deeply as I fell onto my bed, rethinking everything that had happened that night.

* * *

Things got weird on my end.

Steve was acting like nothing ever happened, but I couldn't. It wasn't one of those things I could've just forgotten about.

"Jill?"

I snapped out of my thoughts as Soda called my name from the living room. "Yeah?"

"You're awfully quiet in there!"

I was completely still, chopping up some food for supper. I then proceeded to make supper. "I just...had a...moment."

"Alright."

I heard someone stand up and I prayed that it wasn't Steve. A second later, Pony came into the kitchen and leaned against the counter. "Hey."

"Hey," I said, trying not to notice him so obviously studying me.

"What's goin' on in here?"

"Nothin'," I answered quickly. I looked up to Pony, who was giving me that look, calling bullshit. "What?"

"I'm serious, Jill," Pony said, standing straight. "You've been actin' weird since yesterday."

I shrugged. "I don't know what you're talkin' about."

"Jill."

I sighed and stopped making supper. I turned to Pony and pointed into the living room, mouthing, "It's Steve."

"What?" Pony whispered.

I tried again, mouthing, "It's Steve."

Pony's brows furrowed and he shook his head. "What?"

I pointed into the living room, mouthing again. "Steve!"

Pony still looked confused. "Steve?"

I nodded frantically. "He kissed me." Pony shook his head, not understanding and I groaned, figuring out that Pony was the worst at reading lips. "He kissed me."

"He killed you?"

I shook my. "Kissed me, like -" I turned around and wrapped my arms around myself, tilting my head side to side and rubbing my back with my hands. From Pony's view, it would've looked like I was kissing someone.

When I turned around, Pony looked disgusted. "He kissed you?"

"Yeah." I nodded.

Pony's body lurched forward, like he was going to throw up. He covered his mouth with both hands.

I shook my head, whispering, "Don't be so dramatic."

Pony stood straight, taking his hands off his mouth. "Steve?" Pony whispered and pointed into the living room. "That Steve? Steve Randle?"

I nodded. "Yes, that Steve."

Pony covered is mouth again, but not before shouting, "Soda!"

I tackled him quickly. "Don't say a word!"

Pony and I wrestled around until Soda came in and broke it up. "Hey, hey. What's goin' on?"

"Jill -"

I hit Pony's head harshly. "Pony's just being dumb."

"What the hell is goin' on in here?" Steve asked, walking into the kitchen, past all of us and to the fridge.

I saw Pony narrow his eyes and start forward, but I grabbed his arm and yanked him around the corner. "I can't do supper! We have homework, bye!"

"Oh, okay," Soda called after us. "Finish it soon. We can all play go-fish!"

"Sure, Soda!" I said back, slipping inside of Pony's room because it was closer than mine, and shutting the door behind Pony and I. "Good god, Pony."

"Wha - how do you - and why would you -" Pony shook his head, pacing.

I sighed and shrugged. "It was just a thing that happened."

"How?" Pony stressed. "Why?"

"We were at the movies -"

"Together?"

I shook my head. "I went with Stacy, but we were both ditched, so we just saw a movie together. We saw Peter -" Pony grumbled as I continued. "And he was coming toward us and I told Steve to do something to make Peter go away and he...kissed me."

Pony stopped pacing and gave me a worried look. "Did you kiss him back?"

"I mean, for show, yeah."

"For show?"

I hesitated. "Yeah."

Pony gave me a look, like he could tell I wasn't a hundred percent. "Did you like it?"

I shrugged. "I -" Then I shook my head. "Ew, Pony!"

"What?"

"I'm not talking about this with you!"

Pony shrugged. "I can tell when you're lying."

I put my hands on my hips. "Then why did you ask?"

Pony shook his head. "I don't know. I just miss it when you told me everything." Pony paused, before mimicking my pose, and turning red, and dropping his voice. "Like when you kiss Steve Randle!"

I dropped my hands and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder. "I'm sorry, Pony. But it only happened yesterday, and you're the first to know."

Pony sighed, sitting down on his bed. "What're you gonna tell Soda?"

"Nothing," I exasperated, lying down next to him. "Absolutely nothing. And neither are you."

"Fine," Pony agreed reluctantly, then turned to face me. "Are you guys..."

"No, no."

Pony nodded. "All I can really say is that I hope you never have to go through that again, Jill."

I laughed. "Thanks, Pony."

"Anytime."

* * *

Steve stuck around for supper, and I avoided eye contact completely. Then during a competitive game of go-fish, I also avoided eye contact.

"Go-fish." Soda smiled widely. "Uh...Pony, do you have any two's?"

Pony groaned and threw the card across the coffee table sourly. "Yeah."

Soda took it and turned to Steve. "Steve, do you have any five's?"

Steve smirked. "Go-fish." He looked up at me and for the first time of the night, I looked into his eyes. "Jill. Do you have any three's?"

I looked down at my cards, seeing a three. I hated losing and it wasn't an option. "Go-fish."

"Bullshit, Jill, I saw your cards."

I gasped. "I told you to not look at them!"

Steve shrugged. "You went to the bathroom and I took the opportunity."

I grumbled, throwing the card at him. "You're a cheater."

Steve fake-pouted. "Too bad, so sad."

I kicked him underneath the table and he feigned hurt.

"Ow!" He kicked me back.

"Ow!"

"Will you two cut it out?" Soda laughed. "Let's get back to the game."

"Yeah, Steve."

"Yeah, Jill," Steve mocked in a girly tone.

I looked back to my cards, thinking over what just happened.

Just like normal.

I looked down more to hide my smile.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 4: No-Good-Peter

"You're doin' it wrong."

"No, I'm not."

"Yeah, you are."

"No, I'm not," I argued.

I was the best dancer I could think of. I mean, I was pretty terrible, but I had more rhythm than all the boys combined. That included Two-bit, who was telling me I wasn't doing the move right.

"You have to move your hips!"

I looked at the TV screen. The girl wasn't moving her hips. "No, you don't!"

Two-bit stepped back. "Alright, let me see." I did the move exactly how the girl was doing in on the TV, but Two-bit still wasn't impressed. "You're still doin' it wrong."

I rolled my eyes. "Whatever."

I was only in the living room dancing with Two-bit because I was waiting for Stacy to pick me up. She was taking forever, as per usual. But when she finally showed up, I ran outside and into the car, driven by her older sister, who did her driving as long as Stacy didn't tell their parents about the stupid stuff she did.

"Hey, kid," Stacy's sister greeted me.

"Hey, Linda. How're you?"

"Drivin' you two around is the highlight of my day," Linda said with no expression on her face.

I nodded. "Alright."

"Where we headed?"

Stacy stopped putting on lip gloss for two seconds to talk. "Just drop us off at QuickTrip. I need some more blush."

"Such a beauty queen," Linda teased.

Stacy smiled. "Thank you."

I laughed in the back seat as Linda started in on how girls are just objects of beauty.

When we got there, Stacy roamed around the store for a while, barely making conversation until she was rummaging throw eyeshadows.

"How was your night last night?"

I raised my eyebrows. "What, after you ditched me? It was fine."

Stacy smiled at me, while giving me her sorry eyes. "I'm sorry, Jilly."

I sighed. "It's fine. Did you at least have fun?"

Stacy squealed. "So much! Calvin asked me to the movies, just the two of us, tomorrow."

"Cool." I nodded, running my fingers along the blushes.

"You want one?" Stacy asked.

I backed away immediately. "I'm good, Stace."

Stacy smiled. "I'll get it for you."

"No, really, Stacy. I'm good," I stressed.

"You don't even need it." Stacy smirked. "You're blushing."

"I am not," I said, sounding offended, because I was. I was not blushing.

"Who is he?"

"Who?" I tried to play innocent.

Stacy gave me that look she gave when she knew something was up. "Who's the guy that has been mackin' all over you to make you blush?"

I sighed, picking up some of the blushes and touching them with my fingers. "Steve."

Stacy stopped all motion and stared at me. "Come again?"

I cringed. "Don't make me say it again."

"Randle? Steve Randle, like your brother's best friend Steve Randle. Like that asshole who works at the DX Steve Randle?"

I laughed. "It was one time to make Peter go away. And he's not an asshole."

"Oh, my god, you're even defending him!" Stacy gasped out. "You like him!"

"Ew, Stace, no!" I put the blush back and started to walk past her.

Stacy grabbed my arm. "You totally do."

I never really thought about it, but I was pretty sure I didn't.

I took my arm out of her grasp and looked her in the eyes. "I do not like Steve. Steve does not like me."

Stacy smirked, crossing her arms. "Prove it."

I scoffed. "How?"

"Put some moves on him, show him how desirable you are, and see what happens."

"No."

Stacy smirked bigger. "Okay..."

I sighed. "Fine."

Stacy jumped up and down, grabbed my arm and ran out of the convenient store. When we walked into the DX, Steve was the first person I saw, sitting at the counter, looking through a magazine.

"Hey," I said, resting my elbows on the counter.

"Hey," Steve said absentmindedly, not looking up from his car magazine. "What're you doin' here?"

"I need some money. Where's Soda?"

"Back there." Steve gestured, still not looking up.

I looked back at Stacy, shrugging. She squeezed her shoulders together, emphasizing her boobs, then made a flirty face. After her display, she nodded and waved me forward.

I sighed and turned back, placing my elbows on the counter again, squishing my chest together. "Hey, Steve..."

"What?" He looked up for a second, ignoring the part of my body I was trying to make him look at.

I looked back at Stacy, who gestured me forward again. I turned back to Steve and leaned forward across the counter. "I, uh..."

Steve looked me in the eyes, then at my posture and laughed. "The hell are you doin'?"

I sighed, slumping against the counter. "I don't know." I slid off the counter yelling, "Soda!"

"Jilly Bean!" Soda came running, picking me up and spinning me around, being his dramatic self. "I haven't seen you in forever!"

I laughed. "You saw me this morning."

"But that was forever ago." Soda smiled, hitting my arm. "What's up?"

"I need some money."

Soda raised his eyebrows and smiled, but still reached into his back pocket, handing me five bucks. "Don't blow it all in one place."

I smiled. "I won't."

"Now cutout, Jilly," Soda said, walking back to a car in the shop. "We've got a ton of work to do."

I looked around the shop. "Yeah, sure looks like it."

Steve flipped a page of his magazine. "Didn't you hear the guy? Cutout, Jill."

"Don't be such a slug, Steve." I rolled my eyes.

Now he was gonna be an asshole?

The door opened and I heard Stacy giggle. I imagined it was just a cute guy that gave her a wink, so I figured I'd get on the action and turn around.

He was just a pretty boy, nothing special.

"Hey." He smiled at me, then turned to Steve. "My car needs a fill."

Steve looked up from his magazine, but didn't move. "Soda, this guy needs a fill."

"On it." Soda came around, leading the guy outside.

"He's cute." Stacy smiled widely, looking after the guy outside.

"Yeah, I guess." I shrugged.

I heard Steve grumble. "He looks like a square."

I laughed. He did kind of look like a square. "Yeah, he does."

Stacy whipped around. "No, he doesn't!"

Steve and I looked at each other and laughed. When I looked back to Stacy, she was smirking and I knew that she had something up her sleeve. I shook my head, but she ignored me.

"Hey, why don't you get out there a flirt with him?"

I shook my head. "I'm good, Stace."

"But he was totally checkin' you out! Right, Steve?" Stacy smirked.

I looked at Steve who looked almost neutral while he looked outside. "I think he was lookin' at you, Stacy." Steve turned to me, fake-smiling. "No offence, Jill."

I pushed his shoulder. "If I'm ugly, you're uglier."

"What?" Steve got off of his stool and took off his jean jacket. "Have you seen these guns?" Steve flexed and I felt my skin burn.

"Oh, real impressive." I rolled my eyes, turning away. "Let's go, Stace."

Stacy, still smirking, walked out of the DX with me. When we were outside, she hit my shoulder repeatedly. "He was so jealous!"

I laughed. "Sure, he was.

"He was!"

"Stacy," I stopped her. "Just because we kissed once, doesn't mean we like each other."

"You were blushing when he was flexing."

"No, I wasn't."

Stacy looked away, not trying to hide a smile. "Sure, you weren't."

* * *

"Jill!"

I groaned into my pillow. "What?"

"We're goin' for some football! You comin'?"

"No!" I yelled back with all my energy. Even though it was lunch time, I was still in bed.

"Okay, we'll be back later!"

"Okay!"

I heard the door slam and I rolled off my bed, not bothering to put on pants because I knew I was home alone.

I slumped out of my bedroom and into the kitchen, pouring a bowl of cereal and grabbing the milk when I heard a knock at the door. I groaned and walked over to the door, forgetful of my lack of clothing.

I opened the door and the bright light blinded me for a second. "Hello?" I put my hand over my face.

"Your brother's home?" I tried to slam the door quickly, but Peter stuck his foot in between the door. "Hey!"

I opened the door, adjusting to the light. "What're you doin' here, Peter? If you're here to cop a feel, you're gonna be bummed out 'cause I'm not into it."

"I'm here to talk."

I narrowed my eyes. "You're kidding me, right?"

Peter shook his head. "Can I come in?"

I stood for a second before moving aside and letting him in. "Make it quick."

Peter walking in, smoothly grabbing my waist, shutting the door and trapping me with his arms. "I will be."

I sighed. "What do you want, Peter?"

His arm tightened around me. "I miss you, Jill."

I looked him in the eyes, then shook my head. "You can't be serious."

"I am," Peter tried to sound genuine. He didn't try to hide the fact that he was checking me out. "Nice panties. Can I have them?"

I laughed, not because it was funny, but because I was so surprised that Peter could come to my house and try to get with me after what he did. "I think you've already got some." I tried to push him off of me.

"C'mon, baby..."

I kept trying to push him away. "Get off, Peter."

Peter laughed, leaning in and kissing me. I turned my face to the side as soon as his lips touched mine.

"Peter."

Then my back was being pushed forward as someone tried to open the door.

"Jill?"

Peter detached from me and ran down the hallway, surely about to sneak out of my window. I rolled my eyes and pushed my self off the door, turning around and opening. "Forget something?"

Steve entered the house, looking around suspiciously. "Who was just in here?"

"Me."

"Okay," Steve said, walking over to the kitchen, but still looking around. "Have you seen my shirt around?"

"Which one?" I asked, following him into the kitchen.

Steve had a shirt in his hand by the time I got there. He placed in on a chair and he reached down and grabbed the bottom of the shirt he was wearing.

I turned around. "Steve!"

"What?"

"Don't..." I sighed. "Don't just undress in the middle of my kitchen."

"I'm done."

I turned around to see a very shirtless Steve. I covered my eyes. "Steve!"

"What?" Steve laughed. "What's the big deal, Jill?"

"You're..."

"Shirtless?"

"Yes!"

"It's not like you haven't seen me shirtless before." I heard him say. "You're the one in your undies and you don't see me blushin'."

I pulled my shirt down with my other hand. "I'm not blushing!"

I heard Steve's footsteps neared me as he grabbed my hand to show his smirking face. "You think I'm sharp, don't you?"

I felt like I couldn't breathe very well and I didn't know why. What I did know was that Steve was really close to me and shirtless. "What are you doing?"

Steve looked confused. "What?"

I hesitated. "You kiss me and now you..."

"What?" Steve's voice dropped and I felt my skin grow hot.

"I don't -"

"Did you like it?"

"What?" I breathed out.

Steve smirked. "You know what."

My eye lids started to feel heavy. "I don't know."

Just like at the drive-in, Steve grabbed the back of my neck and pulled my face to his, gently placing his lips on mine. And just like the drive-in, I was surprised but kissed him back.

Unlike the drive-in, I had enough time respond with my body. I placed my arms around Steve's shoulders, one hand staying on his back and the other running through his silky, greasy dark hair.

Steve's hands slipped down by body and gripped my thighs, pulling them up and sitting me on the counter.

Usually I felt uncomfortable if someone did that, particularly Peter.

I pushed Steve away.

Peter was still in the house. If my brother's found out he was -

I covered my mouth as my eyes widened.

My brother's. If my Soda found out that Steve was here, not just changing his shirt, but making out with his sister, I didn't know what he'd do.

Steve just looked at me and breathed heavily. He didn't look guilty, but he didn't look proud.

We both looked down the hallway when there was loud footsteps.

"What was that?" Steve asked, taking his shirt from the chair and slipping it over his head.

"Uh..." I hesitated to tell him. "I don't know."

Steve gave me a hard look. "Is someone here?"

"No."

"Is _a guy_ here?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Jill?" Peter yelled from the hallway. "Are they gone?"

Idiot.

Steve ran out of the kitchen and I ran after him. Peter was standing in the hallway, looking like the idiot he was. I couldn't see Steve's face, but he looked tense.

I jumped on Steve's back, dragging all my weight with him. "Get out of here, Peter!" I yelled, not for the benefit of Peter, but so I wouldn't have to explain it to anyone because I knew Steve wouldn't keep this quiet.

I saw Peter split just as Steve and I rolled around on the floor. "Steve, just -"

"Get off, Jill!"

"No, I -"

"Jill -"

"Steve -"

"Jill, you -" Steve groaned rolling over and pinning me underneath him, trying to catch his breath. "What the hell was he doing here?"

I struggled against his grip. "I didn't ask for him to come over, he just did."

"What did he want?"

"He wanted to talk."

"About what?"

I sighed, slacking against Steve's grip. "He says he misses me."

Steve looked at me to make sure I wasn't lying. "What'd you say?"

"I didn't say it back," I said and we were silent for a good minute. "What are you doing, Steve?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, kissing me, gettin' jealous -"

"I'm not jealous," Steve said in a hard-tone.

I laughed. "Oh, yeah, because you're just being a protective brother figure?"

Steve sighed, letting go of my hands. "Peter's not good for you, Jill."

"And you are?" I asked. "You're Soda's best friend, so what the hell are you playing at?"

"I don't know!" Steve yelled, standing up.

"Do you - I mean, are you..."

"What?" Steve yelled, clearly frustrated.

"Do you want me?" I yelled, matching his frustration. "You didn't just kiss me once, but twice!"

"I don't know, Jill! You're not a kid anymore and you're -" Steve tugged at his hair. "But you're Soda's sister!" Steve quieted, his big hand still in his thick hair. "Why, do you want me?"

"I don't know! I never felt like -" I groaned. "I just don't know!"

It was completely quiet for a hot minute before Steve said, "I should get back. They're waitin' for me."

"Alright," I sighed, turning away and walking down the hallway.

"Jill!"

I quickly looked back into the living room. "Yeah?"

Steve looked at me somberly. "Let's not do this again."

My heart started to ache. "Okay."

"Okay."

"Have fun," I said awkwardly.

"I will."

"Okay."

"Okay."

"Later."

"Yeah, later."

* * *

Dinner was awkward.

"Do you have your homework done for tomorrow?"

I nodded. "Yeah, Dare."

"Pony?"

"Yeah."

Awkward silence commence.

"What's goin' on?" Soda asked, hitting Pony's shoulder playfully. "Huh?"

"Just tired." Pony shrugged.

"What about you, Jilly Bean?"

I glanced at Steve, who was looking at me. "Nothin'."

"Alright," Soda said, then turned to Darry, diving into some part of his day.

Pony elbowed me, whispering, "What's goin' on?"

I shook my head. "Nothin'."

"Jill."

I sighed, raising my eyebrows and looking to Steve and mouthed, "Steve."

Pony rolled his eyes and slacked against his chair before sitting up again and looking at me with an exasperated expression. "Kiss?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

Pony shook his head.

"Ow," Steve groaned and narrowed his eyes at Pony, who I assumed just kicked him.

I kicked Pony under the table.

"Ow!" Pony looked at me. "Jill!"

"Pony," Steve growled at the same time I looked at Pony with judgement.

"Pony!"

"Hey, what're you three up to?" Darry asked.

"Nothin'."

"Nothin'."

"Nothin'."

All three of us gave the same answer at the same time.

"Okay," Darry said awkwardly. "Well, finish up."

I finished up as fast as I could, so I could just leave the table.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 5: "Can you please put some clothes on?"

 _I hummed as Steve's fingers travelled down my bare back. I felt his lips between my shoulder blades and I giggled._ _"Steve."_

 _"Jill," Steve mimicked my tone, then laughed._

 _Suddenly Steve turned me around and I covered my bare chest. "Steve!"_

 _Steve laughed and put his body on top of mine, kissing me sweetly. "Jill."_

 _I smiled, placing my hand on the side of his face, rubbing it tenderly. "Hm?"_

 _"I l -" He stopped suddenly. "Jill!"_

 _My eyes widened. "What?"_

 _Steve was just screaming in my face. "Jill!"_

My eyes opened and I jolted out of bed. Beside me, Pony was standing, laughing.

"Jill, hey. Wake up!"

I rubbed my eyes. "What?"

Oh, it was a _dream._

"School starts in, like, thirty minutes."

"Shit." I scrambled out of bed, rushing to the bathroom. When I opened the door, there was someone in the shower. "Soda!" I covered my eyes before I could see anything.

"Wrong person, Jill."

"Steve?"

I heard the shower stop and the curtain open. I waited a couple seconds before I heard, "You can open your eyes."

I opened them slowly and Steve had a towel around his waist, but that didn't nothing to stop the rapid beating of my heart.

He was so...shirtless and...wet.

"You doin' okay there, Jill?" Steve smirked. God, he knew what he was doing.

"Yeah, I'm fine." I turned away. "Uh, bye." I rushed out of the bathroom and to my room, feeling a blush grow on my cheeks.

* * *

The day really dragged on and on. But, eventually, the day came to an end and Pony and I started to walk home, due to Soda's overtime.

"So what's really goin' on with you and Steve?"

I gave Pony a look. "Nothing."

"C'mon, Jill. You've kissed..." Pony started to look grossed out. "Twice."

I shrugged. "I don't think it's goin' anywhere. I mean, he's Soda's best friend, Darry doesn't like any boys, especially not one's that are seventeen, and you hate him."

Pony hesitated. "I don't _hate_ him. I don't like him, but I don't _hate_ him."

I sighed. "I don't know what's worse; that I kissed someone one of my brother's almost hates, or that I kissed someone that's another one of my brother's best friends."

"It's a breakup thing, Jill," Pony started. "If you and Steve were to ever date, then if you were to ever breakup, you know that I would always choose you." Pony looked at me. "I wouldn't talk to Steve, if that's what you wanted. But, Soda-" Pony sighed. "Soda would be torn. You're his sister and he loves you, but Steve's his best friend and he loves him, too - in a different way, but he still loves you both. Soda wouldn't know who to choose and I think that if you can avoid putting him in that spot, you should."

I crossed my arms. "I know, but what if I..." I shrugged.

"What?" Pony looked at me intensely.

I laughed a little. "What if I want...something...with...Steve." I looked at Pony, no longer laughing.

Pony looked at me like I was on tripping on acid. "Are you crazy?"

I shrugged. "I..."

Pony's brows furrowed and he stepped in front of me, grabbing my shoulders. "You can't go out with Steve. He's _Steve._ I thought it was a one time thing."

I nodded. "It was! I mean, it is!" I pushed his lightly, continuing to walk. "I'm just thinkin' the extreme."

"Oh, thank god," Pony sighed in relief. "I thought you were really considering it."

I bit my lip. "Yeah, pretty dumb, huh?"

"Yeah."

We were silent most of the way home.

* * *

"Jilly."

"Hm?"

"Jilly Bean."

"Mm."

"Jilly, wake up," Soda laughed. "It's time for bed."

I shook my head, feeling comfortable enough on the couch. "No."

"C'mon, Jilly."

"Soda, no." I rolled the other way.

I heard Soda laugh as he rubbed my hair. "You're really gonna sleep out here?"

"Mmhm."

"Alright." Soda kissed my head. "Goodnight, Jilly."

I hummed. "Night, Soda."

I heard Soda stand up, and then my eyes widened when I heard Soda say, "Couch's taken, Steve. You can take her bed instead."

Steve was still here after supper and he was staying the night. It wasn't unusual, but I was on the long couch, which meant that Steve would have to take my room. Normally, I would be okay with it, but it felt weirder now.

"Alright, man. It's okay with Jill?"

"You can ask her, but I don't think she's movin'." Soda laughed. "Anyway, I'm goin' to bed. Night, man."

I shifted on the couch as I heard Soda's footsteps grow further and Steve's grow closer.

Then there was a hand on my shoulder. "Jill?"

I pretended to be asleep. "Hm..."

"Jill, hey, I'm stayin' the night, but I need to couch."

I tried to decide whether I wanted my bed or not, so I joked to fill the time. "Only if you carry me."

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I felt Steve's muscular arms wrap around my back, the other around my legs. He lifted me off the couch, groaning. "If that's what it takes."

I should've felt uncomfortable, but his arms were almost more comfortable than the couch.

I sighed. "Steve."

"Yeah?" Steve whispered, walking down the hallway.

I looked up at him. "I don't know what I want to say."

Steve smiled lightly. "Then don't say anything." Steve somehow managed to open my door and get me into my room, laying me down on my bed.

As soon as I was on the bed, I noticed how bad my jeans felt on my legs. I quickly started to unbutton them.

"Jill!" Steve whisper-yelled.

I smirked. "It's not like you haven't seen my in my undies before." I threw my jeans across the room and started to take of my shirt.

"Dear lord." Steve turned around and looked like he was rubbing his face.

"Yeah, how do you like it?"

Steve glanced over his shoulder, but quickly looked away. "Jesus, Jill."

"What?" I said, growing frustrated. "You do the same to me."

"Because I know you won't do anything."

My brows furrowed. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"I know you won't jump me because you're a chicken."

"I'm not a chicken," Was the response I had, until I realized what he was saying. "You want to jump me or somethin'?"

Steve glanced at me. "What, no, no, I -"

"You think I'm sharp, don't you?" I smirked.

Steve tried to laugh it off. "No, I..."

I made the risky move of sitting up in my bed, fully displaying my body in my bra and underwear. Thankfully, Steve was turned the other way and didn't know. But he sure did know when I placed a hand on his back.

He didn't move. He just stood there as my hand ran down it, only finger tips touching. I got to the bottom of his shirt and the start of his jeans. I let out a shaky breath as my hand maneuvered underneath his shirt and onto his bare and warm back.

I saw Steve cover his mouth with one of his hands and I put my other hand on his bicep to ensure he wouldn't go anywhere, while my other hand explored his incredibly muscular back. I moved closer to him to let my hand slid around to the front of his body. My hand lightly touched his pecks and his rock hard stomach.

My mind floated into the dream I had in the morning as I leaned forward and pressed my lips to the center between his shoulder blades over his shirt.

Steve spun around, grabbing both my hands. My vision lined up with his lips and I stared at them for a couple seconds before looking up at his eyes. He was staring at me with such intensity that it made my stomach flip and I felt sick.

I moved forward, feeling desperate to kiss him. Steve twitched away and we both paused, but he eventually let our lips meet.

My arms wrapped around him and his around me. He grabbed my thighs and pulled them up swiftly, letting them wrap around my waist as I fell backward and both of us fell onto my bed, him on top of me, still kissing.

I couldn't get Steve's shirt off fast enough, but I did, eventually. I felt his warm body on my colder one and I exhaled, releasing any tension that was in my body.

Steve kissed my cheek and slowly kissed lower. His lips touched my neck and I breathed in sharply as my fingers curled into his back.

Never had I ever felt this way.

Steve took me by surprise by rolling off of me and standing quickly. "That's enough."

"Steve," I said breathlessly.

"No, Jill," he said sternly, putting his shirt back on. "I can't do this. I thought I could without feelin' guilty about it, but I can't."

I so fast that it made me feel dizzy. "Wait," I said softly, still aware that it was late and the walls in our house weren't all too thick. "Wait, Steve..."

"What?" Steve asked, like he was going to listen, but he reached for the doorknob.

I grabbed his hips, spinning him around with great force and pushing him against the wall. " _Wait._ "

" _What?_ " he said, and I sighed, trying to look at him with sad eyes. Steve shook his head. "No. No, don't give me that. It's not gonna work."

I hit his shoulder. "God, you're so..."

Steve chuckled. "Difficult?"

I nodded. "Yes, difficult."

"That's just the way it is, Jill." He started to move, but I grabbed him again.

"What if I..." I sighed. "What if I want..."

"Take your time, Jill."

I squeezed his arm. "What if I want you?"

Steve froze for a second, then he shook his head. "No."

I moved my hands from his arms to his shoulders. "I want you, Steve. I don't know why and I don't care." I leaned forward and puckered my lips.

Steve turned his head to avoid kissing me. He grabbed my hands and removed them from him. "Stop, Jill. I can't do this with you."

I didn't give up. "Why, because of Soda? He'll get used to it and -"

"Jill." Steve pushed my lightly. "This isn't a good idea, alright?"

I gripped Steve's shirt, yanking him onto my bed and crawling on top of him, just trying to keep him from leaving. "Is it Soda? Just tell me."

Steve and I wrestled around until he pinned me down. "Yes, it's Soda!" he whisper-yelled. "Jesus, Jill, I don't want my best friend to hate me for gettin' with his sister." He sighed as his head fell down. "Can you _please_ put some clothes on?" he begged and he stood up.

I grabbed a shirt from the end of my bed and put it on. "The shirt is on." I stood up and stood directly in front of him. "I just wanna try, Steve."

"No."

"Steve."

"No."

"Steve."

"I'll think about it."

I tried not to smile and to seem as stone-faced as he was. "Okay."

Steve nodded, walking around me.

"Wait." I gripped his arm and tugged him to face me. I kissed him quickly, then back away. "Okay, now you can go."

Steve's mouth twitched up, but I couldn't see if he smiled because he left my room before I could.

I knew I was smiling; smiling when I laid down and smiling when I fell asleep.

* * *

"Oh, my god!"

I laughed, looking around the The Dingo. "Keep it down, Stacy."

"You almost lost you v-card and -"

"I did not!" I defended myself. "We just kissed."

"His shirt was off and you were in your undies!"

"Jesus, Stace!" I barely yelled, looking around to make sure no one heard. "Will you keep it down?"

Stacy covered her mouth and sat back into her seat. "Sorry. But c'mon, Jilly, you're so close."

I laughed and shrugged, eating a french fry. "It's not on my checklist, Stace. When it happens, it happens."

Stacy looked at me peculiarly. "You don't have a game plan?"

I shook my head. "No?"

Stacy raised her eyebrows and smirked. "Okay..."

"Why?"

"Because there's a lot that happens."

"What?"

"And you're doing it with an older boy." Stacy gasped dramatically. "Has he -"

I snorted, that turning into a full out laugh. Stacy looked at me with uncertainty as I regained my composure. "Yeah, totally."

"Does he know that you're a virgin?"

I stopped laughing.

I could've had sex with Peter, but I didn't. But I could've. Did Steve think I had? Did Steve even think of that at all?

"I don't know," I said honestly, then started to panic. "Do guys like virgins?"

Stacy cringed as she thought. "Um...I..."

"Oh, god." My head fell down onto the table, into my arms. "Oh, good god."

"Lose it before."

My head popped up. "What, no!"

Stacy shrugged. "Why not?"

"I'm goin' around and doin' it with just anyone!" I stressed. "I want it to be with someone I like."

"Why?" Stacy questioned.

I groaned. "Because I want it to be...special."

Stacy laughed. "It's not gonna be special no matter what you do."

"What could be so bad?"

"The blood," Stacy said, too casually. "And gettin' knocked up."

I had to laugh. "I'm not gettin' pregnant."

"What if you do?" Stacy said, shoving fries into her mouth. "You'll have a little Steve runnin' around. God, what a nightmare."

"I don't even know if Steve will take a chance with me. He seemed mighty unsure."

"If he doesn't, he's an idiot. If he does, he's still an idiot, but a smarter idiot."

I shook my head, grabbing a fry. " _You're_ the idiot, Stacy."

Then Stacy threw a fry at my face.

* * *

"Go!"

Soda tossed the ball to Darry through his legs and Darry back up, looking way forward at Two-bit.

I started tor run to cover Soda, as I saw the ball spin in the air, Steve tackling Two-bit before he could get his fingertips on it.

Steve stood up, flexing his muscles and cheering for himself. Pony patted his back as he walked by, not caring as much as Steve did.

"See that, Jill?" Steve nodded at me.

I scoffed. "It's just Two-bit. Even I could do that."

"Hey!" Two-bit yelled, sitting on the ground.

Steve nodded, ignoring Two-bit, and smirking widely. "Try me, Jilly Bean."

I laughed, getting into a ready-stance. "You asked for it."

"Bring it."

I ran forward, throwing my best tackle, but Steve caught my waist, swinging me down and onto the ground. I gasped at the impact. "Holy shit."

"Sorry, Jilly." Steve smiled, holding my arms down. "You alright?"

I groaned, trying to fight him off. "Yes." Then I realized that we had a moment with all the other boys messing around. "Did you think about it?"

Steve's face faltered slightly. "It hasn't even been a day, Jill. Give me some time."

"Hurry up."

"Don't push me," he growled.

"Fine." I smiled, touching my foot to Steve's ankle and trailing up, bring his jeans as far up as they would go. Then, when Steve was figuring out that I was just distracting them, I yelled, "Soda!"

"I'll save you, Jilly!" Soda came to my rescue, like he always did. He knocked Steve off of me, wrestling around with him.

I stood, brushing myself off and walking to Pony. "He always does that."

"What, be an asshole?"

I laughed. "Chill, Pony."

Pony huffed. "I don't like him."

I patted his arm. "No one asked you to."

* * *

Darry was at work, Soda in the kitchen, Pony falling asleep on the other couch, Two-bit on the floor, paying too much attention to the TV.

It was almost the perfect moment to talk to Steve, who was sitting beside me on the couch. Well, it was almost, almost the perfect moment. It was as perfect as it was going to get, only because I couldn't wait any longer.

"Steve," I whispered. Steve didn't notice, so I did it again, nudging him and whispering, "Steve."

He looked at my without turning his head. "What?"

"Did you decide yet?"

I could see Steve roll his eyes. "Jill, I need longer than a day."

"Why?"

Steve turned to me slightly. "Because it's a big decision."

I rolled my eyes. "It's not. You're just making it one."

Two-bit turned around slowly, staring at us. "Hey, you guys doin' okay?"

I gave Two-bit a thumbs up at the same time that Steve gave the A-ok hand sign.

"We're good."

"We're good."

Two-bit raised his eyebrows, tipping his beer to his lips and turning back to the TV slowly.

I turned back to Steve, giving him a look. "Steven."

Steve mimicked my look. "Jillian."

I leaned in close to his face. "Soon?"

Steve smiled. "Soon."

I subconsciously smiled. "Okay."

"Okay."

I wanted to kiss him and I almost forgot that I was in the living room with someone who would shout at the mountain tops that Steve and I locked lips. That someone being Two-bit.

I leaned back, putting my elbow on the arm of the couch, placing my head in my hand, sighing.

I heard Steve cough and stand up. "What's taking so long, Soda?"


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 6: A Bad Mood and a Good Brother

I made my way down the hallway, rubbing my eyes. When I got to the living room, I looked out of the window, stopping at the sight; Steve mowing our lawn...shirtless.

What a sight to wake up to.

I was so enticed by the sight that I forgot that we had that one floorboard that was raised higher than the rest. That was when I was face first into the floor.

"Jilly?" I heard Soda come around the corner and touch my arm.

"Yeah." I sighed, getting up with Soda's help. "Hey, why aren't you guys at work?"

Soda shrugged. "Boss called. We don't have to come in until one."

"That's great," I said, looking out the window as Soda walked back into the kitchen.

"You want breakfast, Jilly?"

I could only focus on Steve's huge arms, but I managed to mumble, "Yeah."

"Jill!"

I snapped out of my trance and walked into the kitchen, smelling the burnt bacon. "Soda..."

"What?"

"Burnt bacon?" I smiled.

"They're not burnt!" Soda retaliated.

I laughed. "Yes, they are!"

I heard the door slam, Steve walking in, shirtless and sweaty. "Is the food ready?"

I just looked away in the fear that Soda would notice me staring at Steve's body. "Soda burnt the bacon."

"Way to go, Bud," Steve said, walking to the fridge and grabbing a Cola.

"Both of you are eating the bacon whether you like it or not," Soda commanded, putting the bacon and eggs on a plate and giving it to me.

"Thanks, Soda," I said, sitting down at the kitchen table.

Steve sat down next to me a minute after that. "Mornin'."

"Morning."

Soda sat down next. "Got anything planned for today, Jilly Bean?"

It had been almost a full week. A full week of Steve not making up his mind, so, I waited patiently while Stacy nearly lost her mind.

"I'm going to lunch with Stacy."

"That's it?"

"I was gonna head down to QuikTrip later. We're runnin' out of milk."

"Get some more eggs, too."

"I need money then."

Soda reached into his pocket and handed me a few bucks. "There."

"Thanks." I stuffed it in my pocket, standing up. I didn't know how long I could be in the same room as Steve while he was shirtless. "I think I'm gonna do it now actually."

"You're not gonna finish your breakfast?" Soda asked.

I laughed, shaking my head. "I'd rather have a burger at The Dingo, Soda, but thanks."

"Fine," Soda said, slightly bitter. "You need a ride?"

"No." I dumped my food onto Soda and Steve's plates. I put my dishes in the sink and walked out the door, yelling back, "Later!"

* * *

I grabbed the milk off the counter, about to walk out of the store before someone caught my arm.

"Jill."

I groaned. "Don't want to hear it, Peter."

Peter caught my waist, spinning me around. "I miss your pretty face."

"Stop." I pushed him away. "I'm here the get milk and eggs, now beat it."

Peter looked at me with a determined face before he grabbed the milk from my hands.

"Hey!"

Peter started to jog out of the store. "Just let me carry it for you."

I ran after him. "Piss off, Peter!" I tried to grab the milk, wary of eggs in my hand.

"What're you even doin' here?" I said loudly. "Aren't you over buggin' me?"

"No." Peter smiled smugly.

I groaned, reaching for it one more time. "Give it!"

Peter pulled away. "Let me do this and I'll leave you alone."

I sighed, starting in the direction of my house. "If you drop that, I -"

"I won't, baby."

"Don't call me baby."

Peter smirked. "Your wish is my command...baby."

"Thank you, Peter," I mumbled, grabbing the milk.

Peter yanked it back. "I need somethin'."

I sighed. "Of course you do. I don't have any money left, Peter."

Peter shook his head, smirking. "I just need a kiss."

I rolled my eyes, trying to grab the milk again. "Peter!"

Peter laughed, easily avoiding my grabby hands. "C'mon, baby."

"Peter," I growled. "Give me the milk."

Peter puckered his lips, closed his eyes, and leaned forward. I took that as an opportunity. So just as I heard the screen door of my house open, I punched Peter in the face.

"Whoa, yeah!"

I smiled as Steve and Soda yelled from the porch. Peter scrambled away after catching sight of Steve and Soda. I kept smiling as I grabbed the milk from the ground and walked into the house, Soda and Steve patted me on the back.

"So bad ass, Jilly," Soda praised. "Have I told you that I love you lately? 'Cause I do."

I laughed, putting the milk and eggs in the fridge. "I know."

Steve's hand settled on my lower back. "Nice job, Jill."

I turned around and smiled. "Thanks."

Soda disappeared as Steve and I stood in the kitchen, his hands still on my waist.

"What's on your mind?"

I boldly grabbed the loops of Steve's jeans on either side of his hips, pulling him forward. "What's on _your_ mind?"

Steve licked his lips. "Nothin'."

"Steve." I pushed him away, walking around him. "Are you gonna tell me, or what?"

Steve looked into the living room, making sure Soda wasn't around. "Let's talk about this later."

"Steve, you've been making me wait for a week!" I whisper-yelled. "I might as well be dating Peter!"

Steve stomped forward. "I'm nothing like him."

"You're just like him!" I ran past him, making sure to bump his shoulder. I shut my door respectfully before turning around and punching my pillow, getting out my frustration.

"Okay..."

I spun around, clutching my heart. "Jesus!"

"No, it's just me." Pony laughed.

I threw a pillow at him. "You're _so_ funny."

Pony laughed more, gesturing to my bed. "What was that about?"

"I just -" I stopped. "What are you doing in my room, Pony?"

Pony sighed, throwing a magazine on my bed. "I can't focus in my room, you know that."

"Pony." I laughed. "My room is the same as yours."

"Yours smells better."

I shrugged. "Yeah."

"So…what did that pillow ever do to you?"

I shook my head, falling back onto the bed. "It's Steve."

Pony stood quickly. "And I'm out."

I laughed. "You're an excuse of a best friend."

"I'm also you're brother," Pony pointed out the obvious. "And I don't want to hear about boys. I don't, but what's goin' on with you guys?" Pony sat on the edge of the bed and I laughed at his sudden interest.

"He's trying to make a decision, if he wants to date his best friend's little sister."

"Okay..." Pony nodded while looking very clueless. "Good...luck with...that."

I kicked his shoulder. "Just get out."

* * *

"Guys," I tried for the fifth time, pencil twirling in my hand. "Guys."

Soda laughed obnoxiously after he missed the grape that Steve threw. "Dude."

"Guys."

Steve and Soda laughed again, completely ignoring me.

"Guys!" I threw my pencil at Steve's chest.

"Ow." Steve looked at me with an unimpressed expression. "What the hell, Jill?"

"How about you both shut up, so I can get on with my homework?"

"Oh, c'mon, Jilly." Soda tried to put a hand on my shoulder.

I pulled away from his touch. "Knock it off, Soda."

"Whats got you in such a bad mood? You on the rag or somethin'?"

I punched him in the arm as I stood. "Soda! You -"

Soda caught my arm, standing up with a remorseful face. "You're right, I'm sorry, but chill out, Jilly."

I pulled my arm away, stomping away to Darry's room.

I wasn't mad at Soda. I wasn't mad at anyone, I was just mad. Steve wasn't making any moves.

So I ran to Darry's room and opened his closet, pulled the stepping stool up and stepped on it, pushing on the roof and crawling into the attic of the house. I moved across the room to the window in the back of the house, where the setting sun could be seen.

I loved the attic because it was my own personal space. Pony, Soda, and Darry knew that they weren't allowed up in the attic - not that they would fit anyway.

"A little help here."

I looked over my shoulder. "This space is off limits."

"Too bad," Steve groaned, just barely fitting through the entrance to the attic.

"Steve -"

Steve groaned loudly, crawling over to where I was and sitting down beside me. "It's so frickin' small in here."

I laughed. "What are you, an old man?"

"Might as well be."

I looked up him, my head tilted. "You're two years older than me, Steve. If age is why -"

"That isn't it," Steve said quickly, looking at me. "It's still Soda. It's always gonna be Soda that's the problem."

"But you _want_ to be with me, right?"

"Yes."

I swallowed a lump in my throat as we both reached out for each other, pulling us closer together. I smiled when our faces were close. "You know, Steve, you don't get enough credit from all the girls."

Steve smiled. "Why's that?"

I touched the side of his face. "You have a nice face; almost perfect, I'd say."

"You're not too bad yourself."

I leaned forward, kissing him sweetly. When I pulled away, I sighed. "What would help you decide?"

"I don't know." Steve shrugged.

"How about a day for just me and you?"

"How are we gonna go out without it looking like a date?"

"Take me out of Tulsa."

Steve smiled. "Well, what are you gonna to tell Soda?"

"Simple. I'm going over to Stacy's. What about you?"

"Simple. I'm going over to Shepard's."

I rolled my eyes. "I don't know why you're friends with that goof."

Steve smiled, eyebrows raised. "Goof?"

I smiled too, nodding. "Yeah, he's an idiot. One of those smart idiots, you know?"

"No," Steve laughed.

"Dinner!" Soda yelled from downstairs.

"Whatever," I said, nudging him and starting toward the opening. "We'll talk about this later."

* * *

The next day was a hard one. Nothing seemed to go my way.

Adding to the misery, I tripping around the corner. "Ah, shit," I muttered, getting onto my knees and picking up my books.

"I like to see you on your knees, Jilly."

I laughed, looking up at Curly. "Shut up, Curly."

Curly stuffed his hands into his pocket, looking around. "Your boyfriend gonna beat me up?"

"Don't have a boyfriend" I said, standing up.

"Really?" Curly's eyebrows raised. "Then who's that cocky ass trying to get your attention?"

I looked over my shoulder at Peter. Then I turned back to Curly. "You should probably split."

"I'll see you 'round, Jill."

"See you."

"Jill, baby -" Peter walked up, putting his arm around me.

I shook him off. "Don't touch me, Peter."

"Why?" Peter said, slipping in front of me. "You're my girl."

It was beyond me how me punching him in the face didn't make him clue in to the fact that I wanted nothing to do with him.

"I'm not your girl."

Peter licked his lips, shaking his head. "You're askin' for it right now, you know that, don't you?"

I shook my head. "You're a terrible person, do you know _that_?"

Peter smiled sickly, touching my face. "I should give you a beautiful shiner to match your beautiful face."

I hit his hand away. "Don't."

"I saw you with Randle. You got somethin' with him?"

I hesitated. "I...don't know."

"If you're his, why hasn't he told anyone?"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not a prize to be claimed."

"Hiding something?"

"No," I said, then sighed, pushing him out of the way. "This has been delightful, but I have to get to class."

"Now, wait a damn second," Peter said quickly, moving in front of me and pressing a hard hand against my shoulder. "Are you Randle's girl or not?"

"Not," I said surely.

"Good," he said, smiling widely. "Maybe I'll swing by and pick you up."

"Don't." I walked around him, heading to my class.

"Alright, I'll catch you later, baby."

I spun around to say something, but he had already slipped away.

"Jill?"

I spun back around, smiling a little. "Pony."

He smiled, his arm coming around my shoulders as we walked down the hallway. "How would you feel about the movies tonight?"

"Sounds like a great Friday night," I said, putting my arm around him as well. "Maybe you could go with Curly and...pretend you went with me?"

Pony stopped walking, moving to stand in front of me. "Why would I do that?"

I sighed, giving him my big eyes. "Pony, I need you to cover for me tonight."

Pony glared at me. "For what? What did Stacy -"

"It's Steve."

Pony's brows furrowed and he shifted on his feet, seeming to be thinking about it. "Steve...and...you...are...going..."

I nodded. "On a date." And then I quickly backtracked. "On a hangout. Whatever. We're going out."

"Where?" Pony asked incredulously, shaking his head.

"Out of Tulsa," I answered, laughing a little ad started walking back toward class.

"What, now you guys are going together?"

I shook my head. "No, we're just casual right now."

Pony groaned quite loudly next to me. "Do you even know what that means"

I rolled my eyes. "Obviously."

" _Sex,_ Jill. _Sex._ "

A couple of months ago, I would've given his a disgusted face and said, "Ew, Pony! With Steve - no!", but instead I said, "Whatever happens, happens."

Pony was the one that made a disgusted face. "Ew, Jill! With Steve - no!"

I laughed loudly, slapping his arm. "Oh, come on, Pony, I've seen you looking at Amy Whitton."

Pony's face reddened, though he tried to look intimidating. "She's a great friend."

I smiled. "Oh, okay." I sighed as we grew closer to the door. "So, will you do it?"

Pony sighed, shaking his head. "No."

"But I'm your little sister," I whined dramatically, tugging on his sleeve. "Pony, I'm just your sweet, little, baby sis -"

"Okay, fine!" Pony said loudly, hands up. "I'll do it."

I clapped loudly. "Ha!" I breathed out, smiling widely. "Thank you."

"Yeah, yeah."


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 7: Steady

We entered the restaurant, and it looked almost identical to the Dingo in Tulsa; floors that should've been clean, but weren't, and people that weren't supposed to be causing trouble, but were.

Steve and I sat in a booth across from each other and we were handed menus within seconds.

I picked up mine, my eyes scanning over the food. "What are you thinkin'?"

Steve's eyes were on his menu too, lips slightly pursed in his decision making. "Mm...burger."

"That's gonna be attractive." I smirked, reliving all those moments where Steve had ever stuffed his face in front of me.

Spoiler alert, it wasn't attractive.

"What was that?"

I shook my head, trying to look innocent. "Nothin'."

Steve started to smirk, but he didn't say anything, just looked down at his menu until the waitress came around.

"Hi. How y'all doin'?"

"We're good," Steve said.

"What can I get for you two?"

"A burger and a chocolate shake."

"And for you, miss?"

"I -"

"She'll have the same," Steve answered for me, smirking my way.

My mouth fell open. "I can order for myself."

Steve's dark, thick eyebrows rose, gesturing to the waitress. "Go ahead."

I looked at her, hesitating as I realized my stupidity and said quietly, "I'll have a burger and a chocolate shake, please."

She nodded surely, taking our menus. "You got it."

Steve laughed quite loudly, shaking his head at me, and I was shaking my head too, but out of disapproval. "I cannot bel -"

"You always order the same thing, Jill."

I sighed, smiling just a tiny bit. "Yeah." I looked up at him, already knowing every part of his handsome face. "I guess this was kind of dumb."

"Why?" Steve asked, confused and slightly offended.

"I just mean that people go on dates to get to know each other, right?" I shrugged, letting out a big breath. "We already know everything about each other."

Steve shook his head. "No, we don't."

I gave him a look. "We grew up together, Steve."

"Yeah, but I didn't actually like you."

I gasped lightly, trying to keep the smile away as he smirked beautifully. "That's reassuring."

Steve shrugged, tapping his fingers against the counter. "You were an annoying kid."

I smiled. "That's what happens when you're the only girl in a huge group of boys."

"Men."

It was mine turn to laugh. "Oh, yeah, sure."

"Well, it's not like you and Stacy are -"

"What?" I interrupted. "Stacy is the most grown-up sixteen-year-old I know."

"She's pretty loose."

"Steve!"

"What?" he said, eyes wide. "It's true."

I couldn't exactly argue with that. "Well -"

"She's the one that introduced you to Peter, isn't she?"

I sighed, shifting my body in my seat. "Yeah."

"She's got bad judgement."

I chuckled lightly, shaking my head. "I like her, but I can see why Darry and Soda are so concerned about how much time I spend with her."

The milkshakes were put down in front of us, each of us grabbing them at the same time.

I sipped the amazingly delicious chocolate shake through the straw, sighing once my lips detached from the drink. "God, that is good." I moaned lightly, closing my eyes for a split second. "Chocolate shakes are - what?" I looked at Steve, brows furrowed.

His cheeks were slightly red, but not like a blush, more like he was holding his breath. "Nothin'."

I smiled, holding the straw between my fingers. "Okay..."

"Can I..." Steve started to ask, not finishing his sentence before he moved over to my side of the booth and sat down next to me.

"Steve, what -"

"I'm gonna kiss you."

I just smirked, looking into his wonderful eyes. "Go right ahead."

He smirked too, putting his arm on the back of the booth behind me and leaning forward, pressing his rough lips against my own. He kissed me slow, exactly like how I had seen so many other people make out at the drive-in.

"Do you two want these now -" Steve and I parted as the waitress held our burgers on plates beside us. "Or should I take another walk around the diner?"

"Oh." I covered my mouth and looked away as I giggled.

"We'll have him now," Steve said, a throaty laugh making way through his speech. He set down my burger in front of me. "Alright. Let's eat."

I looked down at the burger, and then back at him. "I'm not making out with you after we eat these, Steve."

He shrugged, picking up his burger. "Fair enough." And then he took the biggest bite that I had ever seen.

We ate and we talked and it was nice. Steve told me things that I didn't know - personal stuff about his life that I had only heard snippets from when I was walking past him and Soda in the living room. I told him things that I usually talked about with Stacy, and Steve seemed interested - or he was convincingly interested if he wasn't.

After the diner, we drove around for a bit, taking a risky-looking road up to a look-out spot. The sun was going down and it was beautiful.

We stepped out of Steve's car, both of us leaning against his hood and watching the sun lower in the sky, the blue leaving, the oranges and pinks coming in.

"I've never done this before."

I smiled a little, crossing my arms and not looking at him, just at the sun. "You're almost nineteen, Steve, and you've never watched the sunset."

"Watching the sunset is for pansies."

"Hey." I laughed, nudging him, and then I sighed. "I guess that makes us pansies."

There was a long, comfortable silence.

"Jill?"

"Yeah?" I said, still not looking at him.

"You think we can do this?"

That was when I looked at him. "What?"

Steve was looking down at me and he sighed heavily. "You think we could actually be together? You know - go steady?"

I smirked, uncrossing my arms and turning my body to face him. "That was fast."

Steve only gave me a look. "It's not like we just met."

My smirk turned to a smile and I stepped closer. "I'd love to go steady with you."

Steve didn't smile. "And what the hell are we gonna tell Soda?"

I shrugged. "We don't have to tell him anything until we're ready."

"Then we're not tellin' anyone anything."

I nodded, stepping close enough that our bodies were touching. "Deal."

He looked down at me. "Kiss on it?"

I laughed lightly, sliding my arms around his neck and kissing him.

* * *

A couple days later, it was Sunday morning and it was a really slow Sunday morning, which was very nice. Every morning during the week was crazy and on-the-go, so it was nice to have a slow Sunday morning where we could just relax - well, up until Darry had to work. For now, he was making pancakes.

I sat down at the table. "Morning."

"Mornin'," Darry greeted in his deep voice.

"Who's in the shower?"

"Soda."

"Did Pony go out already or is he still sleeping?"

"Sleeping." Steve came from down the hall, sitting down beside me.

A second later, pancakes were set down in front of Steve.

"Hey," I called at Darry. "I was here first."

Darry opened his mouth to answer, but Steve beat him to it. "Actually, I was here first," Steve said, sending a smirk my way. "I was just in the can."

I pouted a little, looking at the pancakes that were currently having syrup pored all over them, and I sighed. "They look so good."

Darry laughed. "I'm makin' more, just hold it, alright?"

I kept staring at Steve's plate, my stomach growling. I looked up at Steve. "Can you just give me one?"

He laughed, cutting off part of his pancake and putting his fork through the soft piece. "Here." The syrup dripped off of it as Steve held it out to me.

I ate the piece off the fork. "Mm," I hummed leaning back in my seat and looking at Darry. "Darry, you make _the best_ pancakes in the entire world."

Darry's brows were furrowed at me as he set down my own pancakes in front of me. "You two alright?" He glanced at Steve, but his eyes returned to me.

"Why?" I asked quickly, nervousness taking over me.

He chuckled a little. "It's just that you two are being nice to each other."

I looked at Steve, who was just looking at me. "Uh, yeah, I guess."

Steve shrugged it off, going back to his pancakes. "I just felt bad for the kid. She was _drooling_ all over my -"

I punched him in the arm, cutting of his sentence.

"Mornin'!" Soda said cheerily, walking into the kitchen and grabbing a full pancake from my plate.

I groaned. "Soda."

"Sorry, sis," he said, mouth full. He started buttoning his DX shirt, sitting down next to Steve. "Hey, so we goin' out tonight or are you bummin' around with Shepard again."

Steve was on his last pancake already. "Nah, I'm done with Shepard."

"Alright," Soda said, sounding victorious as he slapped Steve's shoulders. "Hey, Camille said she wants to do somethin' tonight, but her cousins in town, so I said that I'd have a friend to keep her company." Soda smiled and wiggled his eyebrows.

I choked on my orange juice, setting the cup down and coughing.

"You okay, Jilly?" Soda asked.

Darry patted my back. "Jill?"

I nodded, giving them both a thumbs up before speaking. "Yeah, I - I'm good."

Steve was looking at me and he was looking at me weirdly. He then turned to Soda and said, "How about a boys night instead, Soda?"

Soda shrugged, smiling again. "Sounds good to me, man."

I put my head down to hide my smile at.

Maybe Steve wasn't so bad.

* * *

"Then what happened?"

I sat down across from Stacy. "He asked me to go steady with him."

"Jesus." Stacy's eyes widened. "That was fast."

I laughed. "I've known the guy since before I could walk, Stace."

She nodded, adjusting her seating so her back was against the wall, feet up on the booth. "True." She sighed, placing her hand on the table and tapping her manicured nails against the linoleum. "What about your brothers? They must've been surprised."

I just gave her an innocent smile. "Actually, Pony's the only one who knows."

Stacy's eyes rolled. "Oh, sweet jesus."

I chuckled, shrugging my shoulders and shaking my head. "I'm sorry, I just -"

Stacy pointed at me. "Darry's gonna kick his dumbass and then Soda's gonna clock him in his stupid face."

"Oh, come on, Darry would never do that," I said quickly. "And Soda...I'm sure he'll be cool with it."

"Then why the secrets?" Stacy smirked, knowing she got me.

I shook my head at her. "You're the worst." I looked out the window. "Thanks for the help, Stace."

She laughed. "I speak the truth, Jill."

"Is that Calvin Mars?" I asked, watching the blonde head of hair walk into the diner.

Stacy giggled, standing up and greeting him by smashing her lips against his. I watched as their hands ran over each other, making me feel like I should be looking away, but they stopped before I did.

"Hey, Jill," Calvin greeted nicely.

I smiled politely. "Hey, Calvin."

Stacy pulled him down next to her into the booth across from me. "Cal and I were gonna just eat and then head to the movies. You wanna come?"

I held back the hurt and anger.

Why was Stacy _always_ ditching me for the next guy that gave her five minutes of attention? She was so pretty with her long and glossy blonde hair and bright blue eyes and thin face. She just needed a guy who was gonna treat her right and not pretend to like her just to get into her insanely tight pants or very short skirt - either one works for Stacy's situation.

I shook my head. "No, you guys can should go on without me." I sighed lightly, pushing my hair from my face. "Uh, I think I'm actually gonna just go home."

"You sure?" Stacy asked, seeming on the fence.

I gave her a push to Calvin's side and smiled, starting to stand. "Yeah, you guys could use some alone time." I waved a little, walking outside as I put my jacket back on.

The October air was making me sad. I hated the cold.

"Jilly!"

My eyes snapped to someone running across the street, almost getting hit by a car on the way, and I gasped as he came closer. "God, Two, you're gonna get yourself killed."

He put his arm around me, walking with that certain bounce in his step. "How's my favourite girl?"

I laughed. "What do you want?"

"I just - how about some free advice, Jilly?"

I nodded slowly. "Okay..."

"So if Kathy says I need to grow up, what does that mean?"

I started to laugh, putting my arm around Two-bit because I was also starting to feel bad. "Awe, Two-bit, I thought Kathy loved that part of you."

Two shrugged, seeming a little more serious. "I don't know. She was talkin' about gettin' married and stuff and I made a joke and she got really mad at me."

I looked up at him. "You're perfect the way you are, Two. You've just gotta show her that you see a future with her." He looked down at me solemnly. "You just need to show her that you want to marry her eventually." I paused and stopped walking. "You...do want to marry her, right?"

Two-bit hesitated and then started to nod. "Yeah, I think so."

I smiled, hitting his arm. "See? There you go."

He smiled widely. "Kathy's my chick and I love her." He walked toward me, arm coming around me again. "Were you in love with Peter, Jill?"

"No," I said surely, thinking back on our entire relationship. "I thought I liked him, but it was not..." I sighed. "It just wasn't a good relationship."

"You'll find someone someday."

I licked my lips, Steve immediately popping into my mind. "Uh-huh."

"Alright, Jilly Bean," he said, jumping ahead of me and starting to jog away. "Catch ya later!"

I waved. "Bye, Two-bit!" I watched him go before stuffing my hands in my pockets and started walking back toward my house.

I got there within the hour and I was full ready for dinner.

I walked inside, the house pretty quiet. "Dare?"

"Yeah?"

"Where is everyone?"

"Soda and Steve went out and Pony's out somewhere with, uh, Shepard."

I walked into the kitchen to find him sitting at the table, papers splayed in front of him. "Curly?" I asked, leaning against kitchen doorframe.

Darry nodded, gathering the papers together. "Yeah, that kid." He sighed heavily, rubbing his face. "Sorry I didn't start din -"

"Don't worry about it, Darry," I told him, walking past him to the fridge, patting his hard shoulder on the way. "I'll do it."

"Then I'll do the dishes."

"It's fine, Darry," I told him. "I can do the dishes."

"No, I -"

I hit the back of his head. "Stop insisting!"

His head turned slowly, glaring at me. "Excuse me?"

I smiled. "I dare you to open a beer and watch some TV."

Darry started shaking his head. "No, I -"

"Darry," I said seriously, mostly to the huge bags under his eyes. "Just open and beer, watch some TV, go to bed early. I can do dinner and make sure the laundry's done and all that."

He sighed, rubbing his face again. "This is not how I wanted things to work out."

"Well, it's our life, so..." I grabbed a beer from the fridge and handed it out to him. "We're not perfect, alright? We can't do the right thing every time."

Darry stood and took the beer, looking down at it. "You remind me so much of mom."

I sucked in a big breath, my eyes tearing up almost instantly.

Darry never talked about our parents and it had been _so_ long since I heard him even say the word "mom".

I smiled lightly, trying to keep my breath steady. "Really?"

I still remember her soft brown hair and her soft hazel eyes. She had a comforting touch and her voice was smooth and silky and always convinced me to do whatever she wanted. She had so much love inside of her than she tried to give anyone who would take it. My mother was the most amazing woman on the face of the earth and I missed her very much.

"Yes," Darry said, twisting the beer in his hand.

I stepped forward, hugging him tightly. "Thanks, Darry."

He hugged me back and I think we both realized that we often forgot that we were siblings. These days, I saw Darry as my guardian, not my brother. I saw him as more of a dad, not my brother, and I missed when Darry and Soda would get together and pick on Pony and I. I missed when Darry took the fall for stupid things the rest of us did.

I guess some things never changed.

"Somedays..." I started hesitantly, still hugging him. "I can't even look at Soda because he reminds me too much of dad."

Darry's chest vibrated and his laugh came from above my head. "Yeah."

Dad and Soda couldn't have been more alike. It was the laugh and the humour and the optimism. It was the non-stop smiling and the love. It was too many similarities - looks and personality wise.

I missed them. I missed my mom and dad.

"I miss them."

Darry's hand stroked my hair, just like dad had used to do. "Me too, kid."


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 8: Covers Uncovered

Three whole months passed and they were not boring ones. A lot of stuff had happened. A lot of...important/interesting stuff.

 _"You **what**?" Stacy yelled loudly._

 _I hushed her, looking around. "Stacy!"_

 _Stacy stood in front of me, smirking widely. "You dirty, little skag."_

 _I breathed out a laugh, continuing to walk around her. "It's not a big deal, Stace."_

 _She walked beside me, nudging my arm. "How was it?"_

 _I tried not to smile just thinking about it. "It was cool."_

 _"Cool? That's it?"_

 _I shrugged. "It was a little underwhelming."_

 _"What, he didn't perform?"_

 _I shook my head quickly. "No, that's not it at all." I shivered, just remembering the feeling of Steve's big hands all over my bare body. "He was great. It was great."_

 _She shook her head, linking her arm through mine. "Well, shoot, Jilly, you're gettin' more than me."_

 _"What happened to Calvin?"_

 _She glared at me for a split second. "What do you think?"_

 _I held my hands up, falling into the silence. I looked around. "Wha - Stacy, where are we going?"_

 _She smiled widely, giving me an essence of evil. "It's time to lose your other virginity."_

 _I laughed. "Stace -"_

 _"Beer!" She cheered, stopping in front of the liquor store._

 _I shook my head. "Who is doing this for you?"_

 _"For **us** ," she corrected. "And Tommy is."_

 _"Tommy?" I asked, eyebrows raised. "Tommy...Mars?"_

 _She pursed her lips and shrugged, signally a yes to me._

 _My eyes widened. "Stacy! You don't date a guy and then date his brother."_

 _She shrugged. "Maybe we're soulmates."_

 _I scoffed. "More like animosity."_

 _Stacy turned to me. "Don't use words I don't know, Jill."_

 _I laughed lightly, patting her arm. "My bad, Stace."_

And we did drink - Stacy signifticantly more than me, but I still did. I woke up the net morning with a hangover and a shift at the Dingo.

I drank a couple beers, I got a job, I went all the way with Steve - speaking of, we had a couple of close calls within the last couple of months.

 _I leaned away for only a second_ _to tilt my head the other way before our lips attached again. Steve took his hand off of the steering wheel to grab my legs and bring them over his lap. He tugged me closer, one hand rubbing the outside of my thigh, the other hanging over the back of the seat._

 _"Mm," I hummed in between kisses. "I should probably -" Kiss. "Go, um -" Another kiss. "Inside."_

 _"Not yet," he said quietly, grabbing me and pulling me into his lap, my knees on either side of him._

 _We kissed feverishly and I lost all concept of time and location._

 _The time? 12:23 on a school night. Location? Parked right in front of my own house._

 _Steve was supposed to just drop me off, but we had gotten a little distracted._

 _Steve hands held onto my hips tightly, holding them down against him and I moaned loudly, smiling a little. "Steve..." I said warningly, running a hand through his hair. "Not here..."_

 _"Why?" Steve asked, kissing my neck. "It's not like anyone's gonna -"_

 _"Stevie!"_

 _"Oh, shit!" Steve said quite loudly, pushing me off of him. "Get in the back!"_

 _I crawled over the front seat, falling on the seat and then the floor in the backseat, staying as far down as possible._

 _"What the hell are you doin' out here?" Two-bit asked. "Darry sent me out. You just gonna sit here the whole night?"_

 _"Piss off, Two," Steve said and I heard the door to his truck open. "I was just checkin' something."_

 _"Have you seen the kid?"_

 _"Jill?"_ _There voices were getting further and closer to the house. "No, I haven't."_

 _"She's so grounded."_

And I so was.

Two-bit was the biggest blabbermouth I knew and that would've been a disaster, but there was one situation where my heart nearly stopped.

 _My hands ran over his bare back, the hot water against mine. I pressed hard on his shoulders, massaging the knots where I could find them._

 _Steve sighed, his muscles relaxing under my fingers and he turned around, pressing his wet and naked body against mine._

 _The door suddenly opened and Steve and I sprung apart, Steve's hand coming over my mouth._

 _"Mornin', Stevie-boy."_

 _"Mornin' Soda," Steve said back, subtly adjusting the curtain so that it was more closed. "Uh, what are you doin' up this early on a Saturday?"_

 _"What are **you** doin' up this early?" Soda laughed and it sounded like he was brushing his teeth. "We got work, remember?"_

 _Steve pretended to be surprised. "Oh, right," he said, looking down at me._

 _The curtain moved, causing my heart to jump and Soda said, "Be out in five, alright? We don't wanna get in fight with the big boss. Still tryin' to get that Christmas bonus."_

 _"Alright, Soda. I'll be out in a hot minute."_

 _"Alright, man," Soda said and the water ran for a second before the door closed again._

 _I let out a big breath when Steve's hand left my face. "Oh, my god."_

 _Steve sighed too. "I forgot that I worked."_

 _I glared at him. "Clearly."_

 _He smirked, shaking his wet hair and then wrapping his arms around me. "Sorry, baby, I gotta go."_

 _I smiled, though I tried not to. "What a shame."_

 _"We'll finish this later." He pecked my lips reaching behind me and turning off the shower before getting out._

But sometimes it was nice. When Soda and Darry were at work and Two-bit was nowhere to be found and the only one home was Pony, it was nice - well, it was almost nice.

 _"No, he doesn't," Steve argued._

 _I just laughed, glancing at him, and then back at the TV. "I never said you were wrong."_

 _Pony walked out of the hallway, making a face and_ _stopping once he saw us in the living room._

 _"What?" Steve said, getting increasingly annoyed._

 _Pony shook his head. "Nothin', I'll just never get used to seeing that."_

 _I chuckled and looked at Pony. "Thanks for being so cool about it, Pony."_

 _Pony sighed, walking toward the kitchen. "Anything for you, sis."_

 _Steve smirked. "Hey, Pony!"_

 _"What?" Pony called, now inside the kitchen._

 _"Get me a Cola, will ya?"_

 _A Cola was thrown from the kitchen, hitting Steve's chest, making Steve growl and get up. "You little punk!" And then he disappeared into the kitchen._

 _I heard a couple of concerning sounds of things hitting other things, but the loudest sounds were Steve and Pony's laughter._

We were kind of in the same situation now, except Soda was out with Camille, Pony was out with Curly, Two-bit was probably runnin' around with Kathy and Darry was working.

Steve and I had spent the whole day together. We went out for lunch and then came back to the house and hung out. We had been together since the early moments of the day to right about dinner, where all the hours were blending together.

Darry was home before either of us knew it. Steve and I were on the couch when he walked in, and Steve jumped up faster than you could say, "Oh no".

"Hey, kiddo," Darry said to me, hanging up his coat. "What're you doin' here, Steve?"

Steve shrugged. "I just thought Soda would've been home by now." He glanced at me. "But since he's not, I'll cut out." Steve, still looking at me said, "Later, babe," and then leaned down.

I puckered my lips and kissed him, both of us realizing exactly what had happened simultaneously. Eyes wide, I turned very slowly to face Darry.

He had almost no expression on his face as his hand came up, pointing at me and then pointing at Steve. "I'm missin' somethin'."

I stood and took a couple steps closer to him. "Darry..." I put my hands on his arms, Darry's eyes narrowed at Steve behind me. "Darry!"

He looked down at me, a meaner look on his face. "What the hell is goin' on in my house?"

I sighed. "I'm sorry, we just -" I squeezed his arms. "I don't know, we just got together and we weren't ready to tell anyone."

Steve's footsteps came closer behind me. "Darry, man, I -"

"You guys are goin' together?" Darry asked, looking only at me.

I looked at Steve, who nodded and then I turned back to Darry and nodded. "Yeah."

"And you're keepin' this from Soda?"

I nodded again. "For now, yeah."

Darry sighed and shook his head, taking a step back from me. "You better tell 'im soon." He rubbed his face, starting towards the kitchen. "Or I will."

I watched his back, confusion over my face. "We cool?"

Darry stopped at the entrance to the kitchen, giving a long look to Steve. "Yeah." Darry's tired eyes met mine. "Yeah, we're cool."

* * *

That next week went by pretty smoothly. Pony continued to be disgusted, but less so, and Darry barely gave Steve and I a glance.

I was at work, working pretty hard.

"Jill!"

I ran over, picking up all the fresh food. "Got it." I sighed, fixing my skirt before I walked over to a table and set the food down. I smiled politely, setting down the last milkshake. "Enjoy."

"Jill!"

I paused, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. Instead, I turned around and smiled as best I could. "Hello. What can I get for you?"

Peter smirked as he looked up at me. "Cute outfit, baby."

I just continued to smile. "Do you need a couple more minutes with the menu?"

Peter's smirked dropped and his buddies all laughed. After he sent them a glare, he scooted out of the booth and stood in front of me, his tall stature making my confidence deflate. "How 'bout a date?"

"No," I said simply, going to walk away.

Peter grabbed my arm. "You and Randle finally get together?"

I scoffed, trying my best to make it seem like it was a ridiculous idea. "As if."

Peter started to smile. "You think no one sees you two? I just saw you at the movies the other day."

I shrugged. "I like the movies. Steve likes the movies. It wasn't a date."

"Oh, alright," Peter said, sitting back down. "I'll take a burger and shake then, babe."

I sighed, looking around the table at everyone else. "And all of you?"

"Same," they all said.

I nodded, my backside stinging a second later once I turned away. I looked over my shoulder and Peter, sending him a hard glare.

I _hated_ him.

The bell rang and Stacy walked in, her arm around my brother - the twin one. "Hey, Jilly," she said cheerily, patting Pony's shoulder. "Look who I caught hangin' around outside."

I smiled at him. "What're you doin' here?"

"Curly's comin' to meet me," he said.

I nodded, and then looked at Stacy. "And you?"

Stacy flashed me a million-dollar-smile. "I have a date."

I smirked. "Of course you do."

The bell dinged behind me, near the kitchen and the cook yelled, "Jill!"

I sighed, giving them a wave before walking off and toward the kitchen. "Yeah, I'm here. I got it."


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 9: A Night to Remember

I jogged up to the house, a little surprised to see Steve's mom's car in front.

I was under the impression that we'd be home alone, but we could always just go out if Mrs. Randle really was home. And she was. She was the one who opened the door, smile on her tired face. "Hey, Jill."

"Hi," I said, walking inside.

"What're you doin' here?"

"Oh, I just..." I shrugged, taking the small second to come up with something. "Steve said he would give me a ride to the DX while he was on his way there."

"He works today?" She asked, closing the door to the house.

No.

I shrugged. "I think so." I looked around the place. "Where is he, anyway?"

Mrs. Randle laughed quietly. "Probably gettin' dressed."

My brows furrowed. "Huh?"

She looked down the hall before grabbing my arms and whispering, "Evie was just over."

Evie, Steve's ex-girlrfiend. They had dated for about eight months a year or two ago. Steve said they broke up because she was too much for her - which basically means she was a little needy and maybe a little pushy.

"Oh."

Mrs. Randle smiled. "I know. I don't see her around her for a year and then she comes here and they go straight for his room," she said, smirking as she walked to the kitchen. "I think they might be gettin' back together."

I stuffed my hands in my pockets and rocked on my feet. "Nice."

Footsteps came down the hall and Steve grabbed his jacket off the couch. "You're early, kid."

"Yeah, well..." I said, opening the door and starting to walkout, not even wanting to look at him.

"Sorry 'bout that," Steve said, walking up beside me, fixing the collar of his jacket. "My mom just got home. I thought she'd be working."

"It's fine."

"Hey -" He stepped in front of me. "You alright?"

I nodded, walking around him and getting inside of his truck just as he did the same. "I'm fine."

Steve started his truck, throwing his arm over to backseat and looking at me. "Why are you all the way over there?"

I sighed, turning to look at him. "Is there something you wanna say to me?"

Steve's arm fell off the back, putting his hands on the wheel and turning onto the road. "No." He glanced at me, seeming a little on edge. "Should I?"

"Was Evie just at your house?"

I watched Steve's face drop almost sadly. He closed his eyes for a second and sighed, like he was going to fall asleep. "Yeah, she was," he said, glancing at me. "But it wasn't what you think."

"What happened?" I asked, not getting angry. I would stay calm.

"She just wanted to talk."

"About what?"

"Nothin'."

"Well, what'd she say?"

"Why are you askin' so many questions?"

"Why aren't you answering them?" The anger seeped through that time.

I didn't want to be pushy or angry or annoying, but my ego was a little bruised and I couldn't help but let the anger take over for a couple of long seconds.

Steve scoffed. "It's none of your business."

I scoffed also. "So if I was talkin' to Peter, I wouldn't tell you because it's none of your business."

"That's different!"

"How?"

We were starting to yell.

"Evie wanted to talk about us - us getting together - getting back together!"

"What'd you say?" I yelled at him, noticing the moments hesitation and cutting him off before he could answer. "Oh, my god," I groaned, moving as far away from him as I could.

"What?"

I looked at him, quieted. "Do you still love her?"

Again. Hesitation. And then Steve said, without looking at me, "I'm not in love with her."

"But you still love her," I finished what I assumed his train of thought was.

Steve shook his head. "Nothing I say is gonna be right."

I sighed, rubbing my face, willing myself not to cry like a pansy. "I don't want this."

"Want what?" Steve asked, tone changing.

"I don't want to be with someone who wants someone else."

Steve's brows furrowed, turning angry. "I never said I wanted Evie. Jill, I - look, I don't know how I feel, alright?"

"Until, you do, maybe we should take a break or somethin'."

"What're you, nuts?" Steve said, voice rising for the second time. "We see each other everyday."

I groaned loudly, rolling my eyes. "Then just don't talk to me!" I looked out the window. "Let me out."

"What the hell -"

"Let me out!" Steve swerved over to the side of the road and I jumped out of the truck, stuffing my hands in my pockets and walking away.

"Jill, let me take you home!"

"No!" I yelled back to him.

The door slammed and Steve's footsteps followed behind me quickly. "I knew this would happen, going out with someone like you." He grabbed my arm, tugging me toward the truck. "Let's go."

I ripped my arm away. "Someone like me? Because I'm sixteen? 'Cause I'm Soda's little sister? What is it?"

"Just forget about it."

"Fine!" I said, turning and walking as fast as I could away from him.

"Fine!" Steve yelled back stubbornly.

I glanced over my shoulder to see Steve peel off before I leaned against the nearest building, quickly wiping the fast-falling tears off my cheeks. I sighed, letting every word I missed in the argument off my chest.

I love you. I'm sorry. It's stupid. I trust you.

I slid down the wall and my behind touched the cold ground. I ran both my hands through the hair and tugged at the strands, mad at myself for everything I had just caused.

I was being stupid. But so was Steve. Yet, I loved him anyway.

And he didn't even know.

* * *

"Enjoy." I sighed heavily after I walked away, leaning against the counter.

"Pick up the pace, Jill," Earl said to me.

I looked up at him, just trying to keep my eyes open. "Okay."

"You got a new one."

I walked across the diner, getting a weird feeling as I stared at the back of the guy's head.

His hair was greased back messily and he was sitting in a big booth all alone.

I walked up to him, pulling out my notepad. "What can I get for you?"

"Jill?"

I stopped staring at my notepad and looked at the man, who was handsome - devilishly so, which was how I only had ever thought of one person before. "Dally."

He smirked at little, looking me up and down. "Nice outfit, kid."

I laughed, twirling around. "Thanks." I put my notepad down and I leaned against the table. "When did you get back from New York?"

He shrugged. "A couple hours ago."

I nodded. "How was it?"

"It was New York."

I decided not to push Dally, considering that was never a good idea. "You were gone for a long time," I pointed out.

"Yeah, I was."

"You back for good?"

"We'll see."

I smiled, glad to see that he was back. "You should come by the house. Everyone will be happy to see you."

"You think so, J?"

I touched his shoulder, something I hadn't done in literally years. "Yeah."

He glanced down at my hand, subtly shaking me off. "So, uh, what's been goin' on around here? How's Soda and what's her face?"

"Sandy moved," I told him, informing him on all the old news most of us had forgotten about. "He's going out with someone named Camille now."

"Steve still going with that bitch?"

I smiled widely, shaking my head. "No."

He smirked at me. "I thought you'd hit me for sayin' that."

My smile disappeared, being replaced with a sigh. "Yeah, well, a lot has changed with Steve...and...me."

His eyebrows rose. "You two together?"

I nodded, but then quickly shook my head. "We were, but - we're kind of on a break right now." I shook my head again, rolling my eyes. "It's hard to explain. It's just a lot with Soda not knowing and Evie and -"

Dally nodded, picking up his menu. "Maybe I will drop by."

I stopped my rambling and nodded, picking up my notepad. "What can I get ya, Dally?"

If Dally ever did actually go to the house, I didn't know, but I assumed he didn't because I didn't see him after that.

After work that day, I went straight to Stacy's after, and I did that pretty much everyday.

I went to school, work after that, Stacy's after that. Pony sometimes went out with Curly and said that I was tagging along so Darry wouldn't get so mad about me going out every night. But he did get mad occasionally, telling me that "Stacy's not a good influence", which was very true. Soda would argue with him and tell him that I was just a teenager who needs to hangout with her friends.

Soda being such a good brother only made me feel more guilty about the whole Steve-thing, if there was anything to feel guilty about anymore.

Steve and I didn't talk. We didn't look at each other. I mean, we barely saw each other because I would go out as much as I could and I was sure Steve did the same. But he was still around the house at some points.

We didn't argue. We didn't act civl, either. We didn't fight, but we didn't even talk.

It felt like a part of my life was missing, and not even because we were together, just because Steve had been a part of everyday of my life for such a long time that not talking to him made me feel like I had something to do. It was like forgetting to brush me teeth, or brush my hair, or get dressed, but it was _every single day._

And before I knew it, it had been a full week - a very long week and I was walking around Tulsa with Stacy, not knowing exactly where we were, but knowing that it was a Friday night and everyone from school was running around time, smoking and drinking and having fun.

"Where are we even goin'?" I asked.

Stacy, arm linked threw mine, tugged me forward. "We are going to get some hot meat to buy us some drinks."

I glanced at her. "And how do you propose we do that?"

"Bucks."

I stopped walking, eyes wide. "Stacy!"

She laughed loudly at my face. "What?"

"Darry will _kill_ me if he heard I was in there," I said frantically, fully prepared to walk all the way back to Stacy's house.

"Darry won't find out," she said surely. "No one will even recognize you once you change."

"Change?" My eyebrows rose, not happy about the situation.

Stacy pulled the tiniest shirt I had ever seen out of her small purse. "I brought you a shirt so that we can actually get _in_ the bar." She looked down at her back, rummaging through it. "And some makeup so that can actually get some free drinks."

"I'm not goin', Stace," I told her.

She gave me a look. "I'm just trying to help heal you."

"I can heal at your house, watching a movie," I whined.

She walked over to me, her heels clicking, and she linked our arms again. "Let me do this for you, Jill. Let me show you my world."

I sighed, shaking my head. "I'm going to regret this."

"Yes!"

And I was going to regret it. I was already regretting it when I was standing by the bar with a tiny shirt on and Stacy was flirting and dancing with a tall blonde. I was just standing there awkwardly, an empty beer in my hand.

I was not having the best time, and it was about to get worse.

"Well, well, well..." That voice made me want to roll my eyes into the back of my head. "If it isn't Jillian Curtis."

"Calvin," I said politely, nodding his way. "How are you?"

"Great now that I see you're here."

I just laughed, gesturing over my shoulder. "Stacy's over there."

"I'm not here for Stacy."

"I know." I nodded, looking at him leaning on the counter. "Stacy told me about your hit and ditch."

"She takes things too personally."

I narrowed my eyes and tried not to say anything too rude. "Is this the part where you try and convince me that you're not a complete meathead?"

Calvin started to smile and I couldn't help but to think he was gorgeous. "Let me buy you a drink."

I sighed, shaking my head. "No."

Calvin slammed his fist against the counter anyway. "A drink for this little fox over here."

I put my head down, hiding my drunk smile. "Thanks."

Calvin pushed the beer toward me, stepping closer as he did. "You're welcome, baby."

 _I smiled at him, loving his face so close to mine. "Thank you, Steve."_

 _He looked up at me, starting to smile as well. "You're welcome, baby."_

"Jill?"

"Huh?"

He laughed, waving his hand in front of me. "You alright?"

I nodded quickly, regretting the decision as I started to feel sick. "Uh-huh."

"Hey, you wanna dance?"

"No, I -"

Calvin grabbed my hand, pulling me into the area where people were dancing - kind of. They were kind of dancing. Everyone was mostly stumbling around or grinding on each other, or just swaying as they made out.

"Uh, I think we should -"

I didn't even have a chance to think about what we should do because Calvin pulled me to him, wrapping his arm around me tightly. "What'd you say?"

I just shut my mouth tightly, holding it anything that might come out - words or vomit. It could've been either at that point. I was swaying along with him, arms around his neck for support as my feet tangled in his. "Oh," I said, alarmed that I was going to fall.

"I got ya," Calvin told me as if it was supposed to comfort me, and his hand travelled down to my ass.

I just groaned, closing my eyes as my body went numb for a split second.

Calvin's wet and eager lips came onto mine, moving slowly and sensually. For a split second, it reminded me of Steve and I kissed him back, tightening my arms around his neck for more support.

"Oh, god," I breathed out, moving my face away from his, focusing on not puking. I opened my eyes, scanning the wall furthest away, seeing the absolute last person I wanted to see.

Steve was leaning against the wall in a tight shirt, laughing and looking handsome. He ran a hand through his greased hair and then punched someone's shoulder, his muscles in that arm bulging. He leaned back against the wall, tipping the beer bottle in his hand to his lips, eyes leaving his space and travelling to mine.

Oh, shit.

Steve and I looked at each other and Steve seemed genuinely shocked to see me, and I could imagine that it would be weird to see your kind-of-at-the-moment-not-girlfriend receiving a hickey from some guy.

His eyes were wide and his mouth was open when the beer bottle slipped from his hands and he looked down when it smashed against the ground.

Then appeared a new body, touching Steve's shoulder and seeming to ask if he was okay. The guy followed Steve's eyes to me and I regretted every single thing I had done in the last hour the moment Soda saw me.

I looked away from them, pushing Calvin off of me and handing him my beer bottle.

"Jill, what -"

I turned around, walking toward the door quickly. I ran out the door and into the night air, thankful for the briskness. I breathed in and out deeply, gathering my hair in my hands and holding it up and away from my sweaty neck.

The door to Buck's slammed and an all too familiar voice said, "What the hell are you doin' here?"

I turned toward Steve, who had Soda close behind. "I don't know." I went to go for him, hitting my feet against each other clumsily and stumbling.

Soda swooped in like the hero he was, catching me in his arms. "You're drunk."

"I am not," I said surely, standing up and not looking at Steve, only Soda. "I just...I don't..."

"Well, spit it out!" Steve yelled, making me look at his angry face. "What the living hell were you doin' in there? And with _that_ asshole?"

I scoffed, shaking my head. "I'm surprised I didn't see Evie in there with you!"

Steve's face was tight and angry and he looked like he was about to explode. "I didn't make out with Evie!"

"Yeah, because you only _love_ her!"

"I don't love her!"

"Bullshit!"

Soda stepped in between us. "What the hell is goin' with you two lately?" He looked at Steve, who shook his head and pointed to me.

I opened my mouth to answer and it was not words that came out.

Soda ran for me, holding back my hair as I was bent over and puking. "Jesus, Jilly."

I stopped, wiping my mouth, using Stacy's shirt.

This was all her fault anyway.

" _Why_ were you in there?" Steve asked, still sounding angry.

Soda gave him an incredulous look. "Dude, give her a second, alright? What's up with you?"

I stood straight too fast, waving my finger at Steve. "Stacy took me out, alright? And I was having a good time."

"Yeah, I could see that," Steve bit out in a very harsh tone.

"Calvin's a nice guy," I defended.

Steve's jaw turned. "We'll see how nice it is when my fist is in his face."

I pointed at him. "Hey, we're not together right now."

"What?" Soda said loudly, though it was like neither of us heard him.

"You don't go around makin' out with guys, Jill! Not when we -"

"We what?" I screamed so loudly my throat was starting to burn - or maybe that was from puking. "Not when we're together? You don't even like me!"

That was when Steve seemed to lose it. "What the hell are you talkin' about? Jill, I love you!"

I stopped yelling, my tense shoulders dropping. "You do?"

Steve sighed, looking me in the eyes and somehow he seemed too far away. "Yeah."

Before I could even get close to him, Soda's body rammed into Steve's, knocking him to the ground. Soda punched him twice before Steve got him in a hold where neither of them were moving from their positions.

"You got with my sister?" Soda asked angrily, pulling at Steve's arm.

"I'm sorry, man," Steve breathed out, struggling to contain his best friend. "I just -"

"Guys," I said slowly, the black from the outside of my eyes, taking over. I definitely had my eyes open, but I couldn't see anything. I felt my hands touched the dirt and then my head bounce off the ground before I didn't feel anything.


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own _The Outsiders_

* * *

Chapter 10: Good Life

 _-A moment Jill would never know about-_

 _She was chewing on her pencil, which she shouldn't have been doing._

 _"Get that thing out of your mouth, would ya?"_

 _Jill's eyebrows rose, giving Steve a challenging look. "You gonna make me?"_

 _"You're damn right I am," Steve said, standing from his chair and walking toward her, his big foot catching the edge of the table. He hit the ground with a loud thud and he groaned almost instantly after._

 _"Oh, my god." Jill was next to him in a second. "Are you okay?"_

 _He rolled onto his back, nodding his head. "I'm fine."_

 _Jill's hand flew to her mouth and Steve knew she was holding in a laugh. But when Steve started to smile, she couldn't hold it in anymore. She took her hand away from her mouth, Steve's favourite sound filling the kitchen._

 _He watched her laugh, her beautiful eyes gleaming at him and he started to think._

 _He couldn't possibly let someone like her slip through his fingers. He couldn't mess this up with her. He needed this to work with Jill because he loved her. That was the first time he thought that he loved her, and his nagging suspicion was confirmed when she leaned down and kissed his cheek, softly saying, "You're so cute."_

 _He loved her. He knew from that moment on, he couldn't mess things up. He couldn't let her go. He was gonna marry her someday - maybe not someday soon, but someday he was gonna do it._

I groaned loudly, my hands flying to my head.

Pony was sitting in front of me, a little concerned, mostly unimpressed. He handed me a cold glass of water. "You're a real ditz, Jill."

I took the water, drinking almost all of it in three seconds. "What happened?"

Pony shrugged and that was when I noticed he was in his pyjamas. "You passed out, Steve and Soda brought you home."

"Are they okay?"

Pony sighed, rubbing his face. "They're sitting on the couch and they won't even looking at each other."

I sighed, closing my eyes. "I did wrong, Pony. Really wrong."

Pony's hand touched mine. "Hey, I got your back, alright?"

I opened my eyes and looked at him thoughtfully. "You'd do that for me?"

He smiled softly. "Of course I would. You're my sister, Jill - my twin. We know each other better than anyone else. How could I not have your back?"

I smiled too, holding my arms out. "Please hug me."

Pony laughed, leaning forward and hugging me, but not very tight, probably not wanting to get puked on. But he did pat my back and say, "I love you, Jill."

"I love you too, Pony," I told him, not hesitating a single second.

The door to my bedroom opened and Darry's big body entered, looking down at me. "You're awake."

I cringed. "Uh-huh."

Darry moved around Pony, sitting down on the bed. "You alright?"

"What?" I asked, surprised that I wasn't getting yelled at.

"You okay?" Darry asked, face seeming concerned.

I nodded slowly. "Yes."

"Good," Darry said quickly, standing. "You're grounded."

I nodded, getting exactly what I expected. "Okay."

"Jill, I told you that you were never allowed in Buck's as long as you live in this house."

I didn't even argue. I couldn't. I was too tired and I didn't even want to. "I know. It was a really dumb thing to do. I know that place isn't good for me, and I'm sorry."

"Oh." Darry glanced at Pony and he patted my knee. "Dishes everyday for the next two weeks and no Stacy either."

I nodded. "Sounds good."

Darry sighed ever so slightly and even smiled a little. "Alright." He walked toward the door, about to go out. "Oh." He turned around. "Steve and Soda are in the living room whenever you're ready to talk to them."

"I am now," I said, throwing the covers off of me and moving to stand.

Pony took my arm, helping me up. "You sure you don't want to do this tomorrow?"

I paused before nodding. "I'm sure." I walked toward the door, leaving Pony behind as I walked out into the living room all alone.

Just Steve, Soda and I.

Steve and Soda were both sitting on the couch, each one sitting on the complete opposite side. Steve had his elbows on his knees, head down and fingers locked behind his neck, where as Soda was leaning back against the couch, staring up at the ceiling.

"Hey," I said quietly.

Both of them looked up at me and Soda stood and said, "Hey." He walked over to me, hugging me tightly. "You alright?"

I hugged him back. "Yeah, I'm good." I leaned away, looking at Steve, who was standing slowly. "Are...you guys okay?"

Soda looked back at Steve, looking at me a second later. "Yeah. Yeah, we're cool."

I looked between the two of them suspiciously. "Really?"

Soda shrugged, shaking his head. "It's weird, but I don't wanna be a bad brother or a bad friend." He gave me a sad look. "I wish you would've told me sooner, Jilly, but I get why you didn't."

I smiled lightly, grabbing his hand. "I'm sorry, Soda."

"Just promise me something," Soda requested.

"Anything," I replied.

Soda grabbed Steve's shoulder and pulled him forward roughly. "Take care of the guy. He's all brawn and no brain."

Steve's eyebrows rose at his best friend. "Oh, really? I'll show you some brain!"

I stepped back and laughed as Steve pulled Soda into a headlock and rubbing his head with his knuckles, laughing victoriously. Soda stuck it out for a couple seconds and then said, "Uncle!", causing Steve to let go.

Soda fixed his hair, going toward the hallway. He smacked Steve over the head and then booked it when Steve stepped to run after him.

I laughed, standing in front of Steve. "Wow."

"What?"

I shook my head, looking him in the eyes. "How...did you get that to happen?"

Steve smirked as he looked down at me. "You'll never know."

 _-A conversation Jill would never know about-_

 _"Drive."_

 _"Does she have her seatbelt on?" Steve said, glancing back at Jill in the backseat._

 _"Don't even look at her, man," Soda said, groaning loudly._

 _"Soda, man, I -"_

 _"How - I don't - why did -" Soda shook his head, the disbelief sinking in over the anger and feeling of betrayal. "That's my little sister!"_

 _"I know," Steve said in his deep voice, stopping at a red light. "I'm sorry, man."_

 _"How long has this been going on?" Soda asked, staring angrily at his best friend, never wanting more to strangle him._

 _Steve shrugged, a pained expression on his face. "A couple months."_

 _"A couple **months**?" Soda looked away, hitting the dashboard in front of him. "Damnit, Steve!"_

 _"I know!" Steve yelled back, and he stopped trying to hold back the part of him that wanted to defend himself. "But I can date whoever I want, Soda - whether the chick is your sister or not!"_

 _Soda pointed a mean finger. "And you know how Peter treated her. You knew and you still -"_

 _"I treat her the best I've ever treated anyone," Steve said quickly, cutting Soda off. "She won't take any less."_

 _"God." Soda shook his head. "Why didn't you at least ask me, man?"_

 _Steve sighed at the road in front of him. "I thought you'd say I couldn't date her."_

 _"Yeah, you think I'm a problem? Wait 'til Darry finds out. Or Pony! The kid hates you."_ _Steve shifted in his seat._ _"What?" Soda's eyes widened. "They know?"_ _Steve nodded and Soda groaned loudly once again. "Does everyone and their damn mother know?"_

 _"Not everyone," Steve mentioned, trying to soften the blow as much as he possibly could._

 _Soda kept shaking his head. "Jill is not one of those girls you can just date for a while and then break up with when you get bored. I won't let you do that to her, Steve, she doesn't deserve it."_

 _"I won't."_

 _"Break her heart?'_

 _"Break up with her."_

 _Soda stared at his friend, brows furrowed, surprised in the most genuine way. Steve was nearly never serious about anything, much less a girl. "What?"_

 _Steve sighed. "I don't know what I was thinkin' when we first got together, but Jill's just so pretty and I couldn't help - it doesn't matter, I just - I kinda-"_

 _"Fell in love with her."_

 _Steve didn't say anything, or look at Soda at all - he just drove._

 _"Do you really love her?" Soda questioned, the air in the car filling with pressure. "I'm not talkin' about what you told Evie to get her to stay the night, I'm talkin' about going the feeling you get when you see her, Steve." Soda stared at his best friend, the betrayal in his body slowly disappearing the more he thought back on all the moments he missed._

 _Soda thought back on the time Jill had gotten a football to the face and Steve was the first one at her side. He thought about the time Jill had been flirted with at the DX and what a bad mood Steve had been in for the rest of his shift. He thought back on the time Jill had came home wearing one of Stacy's skirts and Steve couldn't keep is greedy little eyes off of her._

 _It was the looks and the touching that Soda had missed. It was the love he didn't see before, but now he did. Soda was finally starting to see something that was so obvious, and he knew Steve's answer before he had even said it._

 _But Steve said it anyway._

 _"Yes, I love her. I love Jill."_

 _Soda then asked another question he already knew the answer to. "Does she love you?"_

 _Steve nodded. "I think so."_

I shook my head at him, wrapping my arms around his torso. "I'm sorry for everything."

"Me too."

I leaned up on my toes, pressing my lips against his. I wrapped my arms around his, enjoying his big hands running over my body. I leaned away, but only slightly, and our noses still touched. "I love you."

Steve's hand that was in my hair brought my face to him again, pecking my lips before he said, "I love you too."

* * *

 _A couple years later..._

Time flies when you're having fun. And a time it was.

Stacy had apologized profusely for a week or so, even though I had forgiven her the first time she had said sorry.

Dallas Winston finally came around and he was welcomed with open arms and an open fridge. He slid back into the gang like he had never left. And things were different of course - they would never be the same, but at least he was back, and he was Dally.

Two-bit consistently acted disgusted by Steve and I for our entire relationship, even when he swooned over Kathy, he would make fun of me.

Darry was still the same overworked, tired and strict, yet loving and happy person he had always been. He was there for me every second of the way and I was eternally grateful for him. I was also proud. The gang and I had convinced Darry to consider those colleges he never got to apply to now that Pony and I were getting older.

Soda was newly single, always bugging Steve for a boys night out, which he did get all the time. He was still working at the DX and he was still loving every second of life. He and Steve were closer than ever, much to my dismay.

Pony and I were still twins and still best friends. There was nothing in the world that made me think otherwise. Pony had solid evidence from letting me copy some of his homework if I forgot to do it, to supporting all of my incredibly stupid decisions with little judgement and much love.

When we had graduated, we did have a party at the Curtis household, but we had eventually made our way to the cemetery and had a very illegal brew with Johnny Cade.

 _"Cheers," I said, hitting my glass against Pony's, and then we both touched the brews to the headstone in front of us._

 _"Happy_ _graduation, buddy."_

 _I smiled at the forgotten headstone in the back of the graveyard. "Happy graduation, Johnny."_

It was crazy to me that people could experience such terrible loss and still love.

I had lost Johnny, who was my best friend, and both of my parents, but I still loved Steve. And Pony. And Soda, Darry, Stacy, Two-bit - even Dallas Winston.

I loved all of those people so, _so_ much, and I was incredibly fortunate to have had the life I did.

Sure, there were some bad moments, but it was a _really_ good life.


End file.
